Figure 1 illustrates the interconnectedness of the (a) biological/physical, (b) psychological, and (c) social impact of the ESRD diagnosis and treatment on quality of life as described by our participants. It also demonstrates the interconnectedness of these biopsychosocial challenges and the four main coping mechanisms used by participants, which were (a) family support, (b) religious/spiritual coping, (c) avoidance, and (d) acceptance.
We will describe the main themes and subthemes highlighted by participants on their experience of ESRD and dialysis and its impact on their quality of life, followed by the coping strategies utilised by these patients. A table of all the themes, sub themes and examples of evidence can be found in Additional file 3.
Biopsychosocial experiences of ESRD and dialysis
Participants reported that ESRD and dialysis had an impact on three main areas of their quality of life: (a) biological/physical, (b) psychological, and (c) social (Fig. 1).
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(a)
Biological/physical impact of ESRD and dialysis
Participants described four key themes that had a significant impact on their physical health and which substantially affected their activities of daily living and quality of life. These included: (i) general symptoms such as dyspnoea, dizziness, oedema, nausea and loss of appetite, (ii) neuromuscular symptoms such as muscular aches and weakness causing mobility difficulties, (iii) skin problems such as itchy/dry skin, and (iv) poor sleep quality (Table 3). Poor sleep quality dominated the narratives of participants, where they described sleep-related problems such as difficulties falling asleep and frequent awakening which resulted in daytime sleepiness. For example, a PD patient reported sleep disturbances caused by the dialysis machine while undergoing dialysis overnight:
“So the machine wakes you up every two or three hours, I’m okay, but still it’s quite stressful. You don’t get good quality sleep so the next day you feel still very drowsy.”
[PC11_Leong_M_PD]
Table 3 Biological/physical impact of ESRD and dialysis Our findings revealed that poor sleep quality was not only due to physical factors such as ESRD symptoms and treatment, but also psychological factors such as significant worry following diagnosis:
“I couldn’t sleep for nights… Every night, I’d wake up every 2-3 hours to think about it automatically. It’s a terrible thing… I was having sleepless nights thinking about it. It’s terrible as the same thing happened every day and every night; I couldn’t sleep.”
[PA08_Bee Eng_F _ND]
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(b)
Psychological impact of ESRD and dialysis
Participants described experiencing elevated levels of psychological distress throughout various phases of the ESRD illness trajectory i.e. diagnosis, pre-treatment and post-treatment. The psychological impact of ESRD encompassed four key themes. Participants described suffering from (i) depressive symptoms, (ii) anxiety and fear, (iii) stress and (iv) negative perceptions of self. Each of these four themes incorporated several subthemes.
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(i)
Depressive symptoms
Depressive symptoms commonly reported by participants included low mood and sadness, as well as disengagement with others, following diagnosis of ESRD:
“Yeah I see she is improving in appetite, she looks happier, uh, rather than before she looks moody, very sad, too much thinking, not talking.”
[CPA25_Cynthia_F_PD_Child]
A few participants relayed thoughts of death and suicide. For example, difficulty accepting the initial diagnosis of such a serious illness led one participant to contemplate suicide:
“Caregiver: She couldn’t accept it at first.”
“Patient: I wanted to commit suicide at first… I was never this sick and was so sad that I kept crying.”
[PB24_Mei Ling_F_HD]
[CPB24_Jun Hao_M_HD_Child]
Another participant expressed thoughts of death underpinned by a sense of hopelessness and reluctance to be a burden on his family members:
“Caregiver: His children saw how he was suffering; he could not sleep properly and had to keep sitting up. He told us to just let him die.”
“Interviewer: When the doctor first told you that you have to undergo dialysis, did he explain to you the various types of dialysis?”
“Patient: Yes. But I refused to do it. I’d rather give up and die.”
[PC42_Chia_M_PD]
[CPC42_Ying_F_PD_Spouse]
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(ii)
Anxiety and fear
The anxiety and fears of participants stemmed from a fear of disease and treatment outcomes, including fear of the unknown, fear of pain and suffering, and fear of loss of freedom in daily life. One participant expressed her fear of injections and the life she associated with being on dialysis, including having to make lifestyle changes and losing the ability to engage in her hobbies (e.g. traveling), thereby taking away her enjoyment in life:
“Interviewer: Were you scared of dialysis?”
“Interviewee: Scared of dialysis. That’s one thing.”
“Interviewer: Why?”
“Interviewee: Because I saw the equipment, I saw the needle and how your life is going to be you know. I mean I travel I enjoy travelling so I used to spend my time with my daughter. Everything will be gone. That’s the only pleasure I had.”
[PC32_Priya_F_PD]
Fear of the unknown included uncertainty of treatment outcomes and lack of understanding of the treatment process due to insufficient information and preparation provided by healthcare professionals, which increased participants’ level of anxiety:
“He… just oh you have to go for dialysis but never said what sort of dialysis…what will be the outcome…they took me to a room and that’s where I realized. They brought in one big needle ok…where are they going to insert this needle… Here comes the nurse they took my hand and they inserted the needle into the vein. Oh my god.”
[PC32_Priya_F_PD]
In contrast, participants who felt well informed about their condition and details of treatment reported feeling less fearful of the disease and dialysis. A resourceful patient who independently sought out health information from books and the Internet explained:
“
Who said you cannot sleep? It’s all in your mind; you are putting a lot of objection in front, obstacles. Why you’re putting obstacles, because of fear of the unknown. You know what is fear of unknown? You don’t know what to expect. But for me, once the unknown is known, the fear is no more.”
[PC11_Leong_M_PD]
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(iii)
Stress
Participants identified stressors associated with living with ESRD such as the day-to-day stresses of managing their symptoms and treatment. In particular, PD patients reported additional stress due to the complexities of managing the dialysis process and equipment by themselves:
“It’s a very stressful experience, but not a painful experience. What I mean by stressful is because the machine is set to first and foremost fill up, then after filling, it will dwell, which means it will stay in the peritoneal cavity for one and a half hour more or less, then after that they have to drain. It’s the draining process that’s very stressful. If your posture is not correct, an alarm will sound because not drawing enough fluid out. Then again, if we have constipation then also you’re in trouble. So there’s so many areas that you have to take care.”
[PC11_Leong_M_PD]
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(iv)
Negative self-perceptions
Patients’ psychological distress was exacerbated by the perception of being a burden on others, especially their family members. Many participants experienced significant feelings of guilt and shame for the perceived financial and practical burden that they imposed on their children. For example, a PD patient perceived herself as “useless” and “a burden” because of the heavy expenses of dialysis that her daughter had to shoulder:
“I mean you got children but you don’t want to be a burden to them also, for nothing you know for dialysis is running thousands of dollars for what. I mean inside me I really regret it’s a burden to my daughter but naturally, she won’t accept that. She says that’s a duty of a daughter to her mother you know according to her. However, deep inside me, I am useless and being a burden.”
[PC32_Priya_F_PD]
On the other hand, a patient who refused to undergo dialysis explained his strong reluctance to impose a long-term caregiving responsibility on his children:
“Think about it, if you have reached this age, even if you have children and grandchildren at home to take care of you, long-term care is a problem. Even if your son is capable, he has to take care of himself and his own family. Does he still have to take care of you? Can you bear to ask him to take care of you? If he starts taking care of you, he cannot stop taking care of you; but if he continues taking care of you, it’s a problem too… So when it’s time to go, we should just quickly go instead of being a burden to others. Even if we don’t hate chronic illnesses, other people will hate it.”
[PA19_Chiang Tee_M_ND]
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(c)
Social impact of ESRD and dialysis
For many patients, ESRD symptoms and treatment led to an increased dependence on their family in day-to-day activities such as preparing meals, bathing and walking. Some patients also reported being dependent on family members to manage medication, wound care and dialysis. The impact of dialysis on family relationships was especially pronounced for PD patients, whose family members often had to adapt their daily schedules to help patients carry out dialysis at home. A spouse of a PD patient shared that language barriers hampered their ability to independently handle dialysis and medical appointments, resulting in lifestyle restrictions and inconveniences for their children:
“It means our children also have no freedom. The instructions for the dialysis machine are all in English so we are afraid that we will use it wrongly. Once there’s a mistake, the machine’s alarm will go off. I’m a bit confused as I’m old already. So my children have no freedom. They can’t go out everyday; they must be at home to help him with dialysis. Every morning they need to attend to him before they can head to work. It is a little inconvenient for them. But, there is no choice since he has already reached this stage.”
[CPC42_Ying_F_PD_Spouse]
Patients’ loss of independence in their daily life inevitably entailed a loss of social life as well. Some patients managed to maintain an active social life through engaging in group recreation activities (such as those at senior activity centres), church activities or even part-time jobs. However, those who experienced more severe physical symptoms and dependency often described a compromised social life characterised by being confined at home unless a family member was available to bring them out. For such patients, their social interaction was often limited to interaction with family:
“Yeah usually be at home. Because, when she wants to go out she needs somebody to take her out with the wheelchair, cannot walk.”
[CPA25_Cynthia_F_PD_Child]
Patients’ social lives were also adversely affected by the physically demanding and time consuming nature of dialysis. In particular, several HD patients shared that the frequent and lengthy dialysis sessions, traveling to the dialysis centre and post-dialysis fatigue left them with little or no time and energy to participate in social activities:
“Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday, I have to get up very early to go there, then you can’t do much things these three days. Besides that you can’t go out or anything because you come back very tiring, that’s all.”
[PB11_Siew Leng_F_HD]
Coping Mechanisms and Strategies utilised by ESRD patients
There were four main strategies that participants used to cope with ESRD and dialysis: (a) family support, (b) religious/spiritual support, (c) avoidance, and (d) acceptance (Fig. 1).
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(a)
Family Support
In this study, family support stood out as an important tool in adapting to life with ESRD. It emerged as patients’ primary means of coping with the day-to-day challenges of the disease and treatment. Support from family commonly included financial, practical and emotional support:
“Our children told him that they are willing to shoulder the burden and he needs to take care of himself… Fortunately, his children are all very filial… They are willing to put in the money and the effort. They also need to comfort him. To support him, everyone took leave to bring him to visit the doctor… There’s no choice at this stage. His children told him that money can be earned back and that he shouldn’t worry too much about it; they just need to work a bit harder and they can earn it back. But his heart aches for them.”
[CPC42_Ying_F_PD_Spouse]
In particular, most patients sought financial support from their family members to cover their medical expenses, often as a first resort before turning to other sources. They perceived financial support from their family as a form of positive social support:
“In the past, the doctor gave me this and said that if I have any difficulties, I can find the welfare organizations. I didn’t go for it. I can count on family members.”
[PC05_Seng_M_PD]
At the same time, participants consistently reported feeling conflicted by receiving this form of support, expressing a reluctance to rely on others and a desire for independence. For example, several patients emphasised the importance of learning to self-manage their condition and treatment so as to minimise dependence on family members:
“You know you have to learn. Even now I’m not very good at it in the night. On and off I am trying to…because I cannot carry the water bag, it’s very heavy. It’s quite a small distance only but I cannot. She’s very good at it so she’s training me.”
[PC32_Priya_F_PD]
Nonetheless, most patients found themselves left with little choice but to rely on their families in some aspect or another due to their vulnerable circumstances. They acknowledged the need for interdependence in the ESRD journey, and the importance of involving their family members in each step, including treatment decision-making:
“Interviewer: So the time that you make the decision to start your water dialysis, did you discuss with your family members and all that?”
“Patient: Of course. You can’t walk into that path alone. I do have a wife, I do have my children, and I can’t just walk in alone. If anything happens they’ll withdraw the support and I’m in trouble. So that cannot be happening.”
[PC11_Leong_M_PD]
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(b)
Religious/spiritual coping
Religion/spirituality was another key coping strategy utilised by ESRD patients in this study. Religion imparted patients with a spiritual outlook on life and enabled them to face their illness with a resilient and optimistic attitude. A few patients reported counting their blessings, experiencing gratitude towards God and achieving a state of contentment with their lives:
“Because I am so blessed, when I count over my blessings, I am more blessed than other people… I don't want to grumble… I have to be thankful and grateful for all that I have.”
[PA12_Irene_F_ND]
A recurrent subtheme in participants’ responses was the power of prayer, which was often utilised as a method of coping with both the physical and emotional burden of ESRD. Patients described how surrendering their worries and problems to a higher power, as well as having faith and trust in God’s will, helped them to experience peace and hope:
“If I have anything, so I leave it to God because I'm Christian…So they do pray for me. So I depend on divine will… I don't depend on my own strong will or fear, I only depend on God…Then God give me a message, that he will heal me. Then I got to be faithful and read his word and be close to God.”
[PA12_Irene_F_ND]
Finally, participants reported belonging to a faith community as another valued aspect of religious coping, as they received financial support, practical support, emotional support and spiritual support (including prayer support) from fellow members of the community:
“We go to XXX church. There are many believers and we are like family.”
[PB24_Mei Ling_F_HD]
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(c)
Avoidance
Cognitive avoidance was commonly reported in participants living with ESRD. Most patients tried to avoid thinking about sickness and death, which for some included not wanting to know too much about their condition and treatment:
“Interviewer: Before you started dialysis, what did you know about it?”
“Interviewee: I didn’t know much about it. There’s no choice since I’m sick so I don’t really think about it much. I try not to worry about it that much. It’s necessary to undergo dialysis since I’m sick. This sickness must be treated this way. No dialysis cannot, I try not to think too much about it.”
[PC05_Seng_M_PD]
Some participants used distraction techniques such as engaging in work or hobbies, exercising, watching television and conversing with others about topics other than their disease. One participant, who runs a karaoke studio for elderly people, explained how this form of escapism helps to improve his mood:
“At this age, I’d only be waiting for death at home. Why am I here when I don’t earn much money? It’s because I have food to eat and songs to sing. So I live day by day. I don’t think about dying… when I sing, I won’t think so much. Thinking too much will cause you to be in a bad mood and this will make it difficult for those around you to take care of you.”
[PA19_Chiang Tee_M_ND]
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(d)
Acceptance
In contrast to the avoidant coping strategies reflected above, the two extracts below show how some patients accepted and adjusted to the changes in their lives brought about by ESRD. They utilised positive thinking and problem solving to mitigate the negative impact of the disease and treatment on their quality of life. One participant described his process of accepting dialysis and its impact on his daily life, which involved reframing negative thoughts and focusing on the positive:
“You see, I avoided dialysis because I don’t want to change my daily life. Then when I take the next step, I have to accept what is coming. So it’s a matter of how I would psychologically influence myself. I think a lot of psychological effects -- I went in, okay, fair enough, besides 10 hours on the bed, in the day I come up and do a walk around, I feel very fresh.”
[PC11_Leong_M_PD]
Problem-focused coping involved defining the problem and generating alternative solutions. One participant recounted how she embraced the loss of her previous hobbies and chose to make the best of her situation by finding new passions to pursue:
“Yes I mean don’t put it in my mind, don’t take it into your mind, oh that I’m a dialysis patient you know… pity yourself and all that… so what will you do? You have to make the best of everything. Not say it’s the end of the world… It’s very boring. But no matter what, I’m finding for a part-time job to keep me going. I do volunteer work in the meantime I am doing. The other thing is, you must have heard about the allotment gardens the government. On top of it is, I’m very passionate about plants. I’m very passionate, so that’s the thing to keep me going. Because I am very passionate and I have a very positive thinking. It is what you know I’d have exercise and I will be losing weight it will be a regular thing.”
[PC32_Priya_F_PD]