Introduction

While post-war Western Europe progressed in the late 1960s and 1970s toward more liberal and sexual permissive values owing to the sexual revolution, European countries ruled by Communist parties remained more conservative and restrictive in terms of sexual expression (Havelková, 2014; Herzog, 2011; Kon, 1995; Mole, 2018). However, some studies have argued that state socialism facilitated the occurrence of a form of sexual revolution (Lišková, 2018; McLellan, 2011) and that, due to high levels of gender equality and financial independence from male partners, women in such societies had possibly better sex than their Western counterparts (Ghodsee, 2018). To shed more light on the consequences of the officially proclaimed gender equality in Central-European state socialist countries, this study aimed to empirically explore how selected aspects of the sociocultural reality after World War II (WWII) affected female sexuality in two countries, Croatia (ex-Yugoslavia) and Poland. By examining the sexual histories of older women who spent most of their lives under the specific sociopolitical regime, we were particularly interested in investigating whether and how the politically normed gender equality reflected in their narratives on intimate relationships and sexual expression.

Conceptualization of Gendered Sexuality over the Life Course

Following the symbolic interactionist approach, we consider sexuality as socially constructed, with cultural norms, symbolic meanings, and social interactions shaping individuals’ perception of themselves and others, their beliefs about sexuality and, finally, their sexual expression (Longmore, 1998; Warner et al., 2020). We used the conceptual framework of Gendered Sexuality Over the Life Course (GSLC; Carpenter, 2010) to orient our considerations on how growing up under state socialism in Central Europe after WWII might have shaped women’s attitudes toward sexuality and sexual expression. The GSLC model applies a life course perspective to enable a more dynamic and comprehensive understanding of sexuality. It views individual sexuality, sexual agency, and identity as processes (trajectories) shaped by “lifelong accumulation of advantageous and disadvantageous experiences, (…) adoption and rejection of sexual scripts, within specific socio-historical contexts” (Carpenter, 2010: 157). This perspective conceptualizes gender and sexuality as “continually accomplished over the life course, via accumulated gender-related transitions” (Carpenter, 2010: 173). The following elements of the GSLC model were of particular relevance to our study: the process of cumulative (dis)advantages (i.e., how do positive and negative experiences impact later experiences?), sexual agency trajectory (how is sexual agency exercised at different life stages; are there turning points at which the agency substantially changes?), intersecting trajectories (how are various trajectories—sexual, marital, parental, and professional—interwoven, affecting each other?), and historical context (how do social class, standard of living, and religion influence sexual trajectories?). The GSLC perspective was thus used to navigate through the sexual histories of older Croatian and Polish women under state socialism.

In line with the GSLC model, which sees sexuality as a process inherently anchored within a specific socio-historical context, it is impossible to fully understand the nuances of one’s sexual trajectory without it. In the following sections, we briefly describe the historical context of state socialism in the two countries, highlighting the importance of a sociocultural blend of pre-socialist religious tradition and modernist proclamation of women’s liberation and socialist gender equality.

State Socialism and the Quest for Gender Equality

State socialism sought to build a new society, free of inequalities including the traditional (‘bourgeois’) subjugation of women (Lišková, 2018). During the early postwar days, state socialism emphasized the communist ideal of gender equality, as expressed in early Bolshevik rhetoric that aimed to eradicate traditional Russian patriarchy by revolutionizing gender relations (Kon, 1995). After WWII, a legal framework was established in the Soviet Union to guarantee equality for women, including full citizenship rights and equal pay. This legal framework was largely copied by other state-socialist countries (Gradskova et al., 2020; Havelková, 2014).

The primary way of emancipating the socialist woman was to ensure her participation in the labour force (Gal & Kligman, 2000). In contrast to the American and Western postwar model of male breadwinners and female homemakers—which promptly replaced the active role of women in the war-time economy—women under state socialism were encouraged to join the workforce and become active builders of a new society (Gradskova et al., 2020; Herzog, 2011). Consequently, they would gain some economic and financial independence from their father and husband. They were also encouraged to study because formal education was required for a skilled working force and ideologically competent comrades devoted to building a better society (Ghodsee, 2018).

The bourgeois ideology of marriage was rejected as a means of reproducing a class society through the inter-generational transfer of economic capital and status. In contrast, socialist marriage was meant to be based on equality, freedom, and mutual affection rather than economic and social transmission (Košiček, 1965; Lišková, 2018). Spouses were not expected to stay together if their love disappeared; women were legally entitled to file for a divorce, as well as to an equal share of joint property and equal power in parental decision-making. According to the Polish family law codified in 1950, men and women had equal rights in marriage and responsibilities as parents (Fiedorczyk, 2011).

Re-traditionalization, the Role of Church and “Natural” Gender Differences

Beyond official proclamations and formal norms, the communist ideology of gender equality had limited reach (Gewinner, 2020). The reason was twofold. Firstly, state socialism was, in general, rather prudish and conservative regarding sexuality. As Herzog noted: ‘Soviet Communism relied on an intolerant and negative view of sex. Self-discipline and marital and family stability were demanded for the sake of both the nation and the Communist Party’ (Herzog, 2011: 100). Politically and normatively, the body and sexuality were treated as taboo in public discussion in a number of Soviet-ruled countries, including Poland and Yugoslavia, due to the ideological hostility toward individual autonomy and freedom (Gradskova et al., 2020; Mole, 2018). Sexual practices, if discussed at all, were done so in the context of marriage and reproduction, and the family functions were overall subordinate to the goals of a socialist society (Temkina & Zdravomyslova, 2015). Although sexual liberties theoretically corresponded with the socialist ideal of gender equality, they were too readily interpreted as corrupting influences of the capitalist West. For example, despite the decriminalization of male homosexuality (1932 in Poland and 1977 in Croatia; Karczewski, 2023), individuals who were identified as gay and lesbian were often perceived by the state as perverse victims of Western sexual promiscuity, people whose lives were at odds with communist sexual morality (Szulc, 2018).

Secondly, daily practices under state socialism often remained anchored in a traditional culture that was—in the Polish and Croatian cases—strongly influenced by the Catholic religion. Throughout history, the Roman Catholic Church played an important symbolic and political role in both countries, primarily as the guardian of national identity under foreign rule (Ramet, 1989). In Croatia, the Church played a significant role in drawing demarcation lines between the two biggest ethnic groups in former Yugoslavia—Orthodox Serbs and Roman Catholic Croats. The importance of religion as a crucial ethnonational marker only intensified during the violent disintegration of Yugoslavia and the war in Croatia (1991–1995). Similarly, Catholicism has been a historical part of national identity in Poland. Religious faith became synonymous with patriotism, which helped in infusing everyday mores with Catholic beliefs and values (Chrypinski, 1989; Valkenier, 1956). Despite the Polish Communist Party’s efforts to discredit and silence the Catholic Church, its sociocultural influence remained substantial (Kościańska, 2021). During the 1980s, its influence only increased as the Polish Church became the symbol of a continuing struggle for liberation from Soviet Russia (Chrypinsky, 1989).

Traditionally, the Catholic Church has emphasized pre-marital sexual abstinence (chastity), the sanctity of marriage, and a procreative perspective on sexual activity. This view was frequently accompanied by a strong disdain for sexual pleasure—particularly female sexual pleasure—as a value in itself and a tendency to perceive sexual pleasure as sinful and shameful (Horntrich, 2020). Among those who adhere to the Church’s moral guidelines, it may have translated into devaluating hedonistic dimension of sex, considering premarital sex, contraception or abortion as a sin, and discouraging divorce.

In Poland, backlash against the policies of gender emancipation and equality began already in the mid-1950s, when the process of de-Stalinization met with the nationalist tendencies that identified the emancipation of women as a Soviet phenomenon (Fidelis, 2010). Alleged promiscuity of young women, degeneration of moral values, and similar claims were raised against the Soviet ideology. Polish communist leaders responded by reinforcing traditional values by officially recognizing the distinctive and immutable ‘psychophysical characteristics’ of each gender and suggesting that women may do and feel better in more feminine occupations, including home-keeping (Fidelis, 2010). Although officially continuing to proclaim gender equality, by 1960 the regime reinterpreted its meaning using traditional (patriarchal) tropes, such as ‘women’s ideal and proper roles’ and ‘natural differences’ between the genders (Gal & Kligman, 2000, p. 5). Simultaneously, discourses and policies emphasizing the central importance of motherhood began to proliferate. By the late 1960s, many Soviet-ruled countries, including Poland and Yugoslavia, embarked upon pronatalist policies characterized by material and symbolic incentives for childbearing, including enhanced childcare bonuses and extended maternity leave (Havelková, 2014; Lišková, 2018). Women were encouraged to work part-time to have time for their children and the family. This new party line met with its main ideological opponent’s approval. The Catholic Church opined that ‘women play a vital role in society as faithful and fecund wives, whose identity revolve around their family and whose needs are the needs of their family’ (Mikołajczak & Pietrzak, 2015: 174).

The Current Study

By exploring personal narratives of older Croatian and Polish women, this study aimed to contribute to the understanding of a gap between state socialist norms, particularly the proclaimed gender equality, and women’s perception and expression of sexuality in their lived experiences. Experiences of female sexuality under state socialism in Poland or Croatia have not been extensively studied outside of historical scholarship where the phenomenon has been addressed either as a part of wider analyses of gender and reproductive policies in contemporary European history (e.g., Harsch, 2014; Herzog, 2011) or linked to the process of post-WWII socialist modernization (e.g., Fidelis, 2010; Kościańska, 2016). Using qualitative data collected in interviews with older Croatian and Polish women, we investigated whether and to what extent the state socialist ideology of gender equality can be linked to their narratives on intimate relationships and sexual expression.

Method

Participants and Recruitment

Semi-structured in-depth interviews were conducted with 35 older Croatian and Polish women aged 65 –93 (M = 73.5, SD = 7.57). Given the lack of research on this topic in both countries, the sample was purposefully diverse in terms of the participants’ relationship status, educational background, and socioeconomic status. Regarding the current relationship status, 63% of women (N = 22) did not have a partner at the time of the interview, seven (20%) were in a long-term relationship, and six (17%) declared being in a new relationship. A majority of the participants (N = 21, 60%) had secondary/vocational education, 11 (31%) had tertiary or higher education, and three (9%) had only primary education (see Table 1 for full demographic details of both subsamples).

Table 1 Participants’ sociodemographic characteristics
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Older individuals were recruited for the study by presenting information about the research and its scope. In Croatia, most participants were recruited from retirement homes and gerontology centres in a large city. Public lectures on older adults’ sexuality were also used to reach potential participants. In Poland, posters and flyers were distributed at health centres, pharmacies, Universities of the Third Age (U3A) venues, and retirement homes in two southern cities. Interested individuals were given concise information about the study’s goals, and verified against the recruitment criterion, that is being 65 years or older. Prospective participants were assured of anonymity and confidentiality and informed of their right to discontinue at any time. The study procedures were approved by the Research Ethics Committees of the respective Departments and Universities.

Data Collection

The first author conducted semi-structured, face-to-face interviews in Poland, while a research assistant of the second author conducted them in Croatia. Interviews were held at the participant’s preferred location, such as their house, a coffee shop (in Croatia), or the interviewer’s office, ensuring complete privacy. Lasting one and a half to three hours, the interviews were audio recorded with informed consent obtained beforehand. As part of a larger study exploring older adults’ sexuality, our interviews covered various topics, including participants’ relationship and sexual history, current sexual life, sexual health and problems, and attitudes and beliefs regarding sexuality in later life. The conversational style of the interviews allowed for participant-driven discussion, enabling the exploration of unique biographical issues.

Particular attention was paid to the establishment of initial trust and rapport, important for discussing sensitive topics. Interviews usually began with questions regarding demographic background and relationship history, before moving on to questions about sex life. While several interviewees appeared somewhat nervous at the beginning, gradual acclimatization in the course of the interview seemed to erase any discomfort; none of the interviewees stopped the conversation before its intended end. According to participants’ observations shared after the interview, the two interviewers’ comparatively younger age (in their 30 s) did not seem to inhibit disclosure. Several participants suggested that the interviewers were primarily experienced as neutral researchers (e.g., ‘Please do not hesitate to ask me about anything. I know how important it is for your work to be accurate’). While some Polish participants found it easier to talk to a female interviewer, none of the women in Croatia expressed any concerns about being interviewed by a male (who was trained by a psychotherapist and a colleague who had conducted a similar study in Norway). The Polish interviewer’s clinical expertise and the extensive training of the Croatian interviewer seemed essential in creating a respectful yet relaxed atmosphere and handling emotional reactions during the interviews.

Data Analysis

The following question guided the current study: ‘How do older women's narratives about their intimate relationships and sexual expression reflect gender (in)equality?’. In line with the chosen theoretical framework (the GSLC model), we sought information on various (dis)advantageous experiences across the interviewees’ life course. Reflexive thematic analysis (RTA) was employed for analyzing the data (Braun & Clarke, 2019, 2021), with an inductive approach, as it allows minimal a priori assumptions and helps in identifying meanings directly from the data. To ensure the RTA’s quality and the findings’ trustworthiness, the analysis followed the reflexive steps outlined by Braun and Clarke (2006). A constructivist epistemological approach was used that viewed knowledge as contextually situated and produced between the interviewer and the interviewee, with a focus on individual subjective meanings.

The reflexive phases of the RTA were interwoven into four stages to allow a thorough analysis of data in Polish and Croatian, the native languages of the first (GGG) and second author (AS) respectively. Table 2 presents details of the recurrent process of data analysis. In the first stage, GGG familiarized herself with the Polish data through multiple readings of all the transcripts and created a provisional coding list based on the content relevant to the research question. Using constant comparison, GGG combined the codes into preliminary themes based on similarity in meaning and reviewed them for consistency⁠. The resulting initial thematic structure, together with illustrative statements, was translated into English and agreed upon by both authors. In the second stage, AS used the initial thematic structure to analyze the Croatian transcripts. Existing themes were verified and/or revised to include new notions and the resulting thematic map was discussed extensively by the authors. In the third stage, GGG systematically applied the updated thematic structure to the Polish transcripts to verify that the proposed themes remain supported by data. Finally, the authors discussed and revised the results to ensure a detailed and accurate representation of the collected data. The final thematic map (Fig. 1) provides an overview of the phenomenon under investigation. Participants’ names were replaced by pseudonyms.

Table 2 Analytical process
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Fig. 1
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Final map of themes and subthemes

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Reflexive processes were integral to this project. Both authors had to navigate a complex positionality within the current study. One team member, an early career researcher in psychology, a psychotherapist, introduced a perspective of a woman in her 30s who grew up in early post-communist Poland. The other team member, an accomplished male faculty and a therapist based in Croatia (who grew up in state socialism), offered another perspective shaped by his extensive research in human sexuality and sociological background. Our interest in ways of experiencing sexuality by middle-aged and older women stemmed from personal observations in our social environments triggered by our participation in a multi-country European research project on healthy sexual ageing. Contextualizing the collected narratives was navigated by our personal experiences and scholarly understanding of the historical and socio-cultural characteristics of our respective countries. During data analysis, the two authors often discussed their views about gender roles, sexuality, and religion to become more aware of their potential biases. We recognized ways that our gender, age, cultural backgrounds, and class positions might have influenced our reading of the collected narratives. This reflexivity underscored our commitment to transparency and critical self-awareness in the research process and was helpful in the assessment of study limitations.

Results

This study explored the sexual histories of women who spent most of their lives under state socialism. The GSLC model oriented our analysis towards identifying various (dis)advantageous experiences of gender (in)equality narrated by our participants as impactful on their sexuality. We have organized the findings under two main themes: ‘Gender Inequality and Female Sexuality Marginalized’ and ‘Gender Equality Actualized’.

Gender Inequality and Female Sexuality Marginalized

The first main theme focuses on our interviewees’ accounts of gender inequality in the sexual domain. Experiences falling into this theme were most often experienced within the family-of-origin or in the first marriage and therefore were arranged into two subthemes: Sex-negative Family Socialization and Troubled Marital Life. Contrasting and disconfirming cases, particularly related to the husband figure, will be presented in the second main theme.

Sex-negative Family Socialization

During interviews, the topic of gender inequality first arose when participants discussed gendered family role models predominant during their formative years. When describing their family-of-origin arrangements, they almost uniformly recalled their parents following the traditional division of female homemakers and male breadwinners, recounting the ‘typical arrangement of the time’ where the father worked, and the mother took care of the children. References to such an arrangement surfaced often when interviewees discussed parental interactions (e.g. ‘when mom was cooking/cleaning…’) or in instances where the father’s frequent absence due to work or alcohol-fuelled company events led to parental conflicts. A 74-year-old Grażyna, who had four older brothers, explained that even if a mother had paid employment, all the housework would remain on her shoulders: ‘I tried to help at home, because it was only my mother to do the housework, cooking, cleaning, washing, gardening (…) Around Christmas or Easter after coming back from the office she would keep working all night to cook and bake for the whole family, all festive dishes for three days, and prepare the house’. (Grażyna, 74, Poland). Her mother never objected or tried to engage male family members in daily tasks, which becomes more understandable in the context of another participant’s recollection of her father’s reaction when he was asked to hold a baby: ‘He was shocked and speechless. “Woman, have you lost your mind? You want me to hold the child so that everyone will laugh at me?”’ (Ewa, 72, Poland). These and similar accounts illustrate how family role models fostered a strict gender division of rights and responsibilities, which was considered normal at the time. In the eyes of our interviewees, women were respected primarily as dutiful wives, caring mothers, and exemplary housewives, according to their ‘essential marital duties’. The majority of participants talked about being brought up to accept and enact traditional gender roles, particularly in the context of family and marital life.

Regarding family messages on the female body and sexuality, participants recollected them as rather negative. In most cases, mothers avoided the topic of physiological changes during their daughter’s puberty, resorting to indirect means of quasi-education such as providing a book or sanitary products without a commentary, like in the case of Dagmar (65), who the next day after having her first period ‘found cotton wool and a booklet about menstruation on my desk. No talk, nothing’. As a result, participants often remembered feeling embarrassed about entering womanhood and viewing the topic as inappropriate to talk about: ‘My mum didn’t even know when I got my period, I was 13. She didn’t initiate the talk because I was very slim, no visible breasts. I told a friend [about first menstruation] because I was ashamed to tell my mum’. (Krystyna, 71, Poland). Some mothers were more direct, but in a disapproving manner, as voiced by a 67-year-old Ana: ‘My mother used to tell me: “Don’t even think of coming home pregnant!” My breasts were already bigger than hers, so she would hit me across my back saying: “Stop flaunting your boobs!”’ (Ana, 76, Croatia). Previously mentioned Dagmar revealed that she only recognized her attractiveness as an adult, attributing the fact to never receiving positive comments at home about her appearance as a girl. Consequently, she spent years believing she was unattractive and undesirable for dating. Experiences such as these were recalled as hardly conducive to the formation of positive body-related attitudes in adolescent women. For Ana, Dagmar, and other interviewees, it often reinforced the belief that the female body and its functions are constraining, embarrassing, or even shameful.

Moreover, women interviewed remembered being warned repeatedly as adolescent girls about the perils of engaging in sexual activity, such as unwanted pregnancy, single motherhood, and reputation loss. Grandfather of an 82-year-old Ivana ‘when drunk, would blame my mother for being an out-of-wedlock child. The message was: you need to be very careful with men, you should not trust them. (…) Men would just use you and leave’ (Ivana, 82, Croatia). The ‘message’ she referred to, even though not explicitly told, was a family transmission that affected Ivana’s later fear of intimacy with men. Similarly, Maria explained that even if a pregnant girl left by the boy was not socially rejected, she was still judged scornfully: ‘My parents would comment: “Poor girl… But she has no one to blame but herself. Everyone knows what boys are like; she should have known better”’ (Maria, 70, Poland). Maria understood that to avoid such fate she should be chaste and protect her reputation as a decent girl. Sex for pleasure, without consequences, was a boys’ domain, while young women were strongly discouraged from sexual (or even romantic) encounters. Family norms about female versus male sexual activity were gendered and, in the eyes of our interviewees, kept reinforcing their concerns and reluctance toward sex as dangerous.

Our interviewees often mentioned their mothers’ ambivalent or negative attitudes toward physical closeness with their husbands, such as embarrassment, evasion or avoidance. In some cases, it was attributed to a mother’s personality in an otherwise happy relationship, with Jolanta’s recollection about her parents’ closeness: ‘My mother was very shy, prudish… Very. She loved my dad, they loved each other, but whenever dad tried to put his arm around her waist, she would blush and run away.’ (Jolanta, 66, Poland). In other cases, our interviewees ascribed their mothers’ resentment to a dysfunctional or abusive relationship. Nevertheless, it was suggestive that sex was not to be desired or enjoyed, but a marital duty to be fulfilled. A 71-year-old widow recalled her mother’s disclosure at a later age: “My mom admitted treating sex as something necessary to have children. That’s how she was raised, and how my grandmother was raised; once you have children, you don’t sleep with your husband anymore.” (Krystyna, 71, Poland). Krystyna attributed her reluctance toward sex in marriage to her mother’s modelling, stating: ‘She made me the same!’. We have identified similar accounts in many narratives, indicating that such generational transfer about sex not being desirable and gratifying for a woman was common and influential for our participants’ attitudes toward sex later in life.

Troubled Marital Life

The context of marriage was another moment in the participants’ life narratives where gender inequality came clearly to the fore. Socio-cultural pressures dictated some marital arrangements, due to unplanned pregnancies, economic imperatives, or status-enhancing ambitions, the last one illustrated by Helen, who was compelled to marry a man who had a higher degree and became interested in her: ‘My mother said: „You have to! We will have a Master’s degree in the family!” Back then, that was a big thing, an honour’. (Helen, 76, Poland). She admitted that it did not occur to her that she could have her own opinion and disagree with her parents’ decision. Regrettably, her husband proved to be an alcoholic and violent man, and the necessity to live with a man she found repulsive resulted in Helen’s aversion to sex or any closer contact with men. In less extreme cases, several interviewees admitted that a chance for better life prospects (e.g., moving from rural to urban area) was behind the decision to marry. Overall, women would enter such relationships in a subordinate position, of which both sides were acutely aware; thus, gender equality in marriage was unlikely.

In the case of an unplanned pregnancy, women had a limited ability to choose a life partner and to negotiate equal terms of entry into the marriage. A 65-year-old divorcee in such words described her future husband: ‘I knew he was a poor husband and father material. He was OK as a boyfriend, but I couldn’t imagine him as a husband (…) The wedding was because of the child. It was our joint decision, but we were not a good match (…) Well, it was the way it had to be’. (Ewa, 65, Poland). The analysis of Ewa’s story and that of several others indicated that a marriage entered out of necessity somehow blocked them from considering their relationship a space for negotiation, setting rules for equal rights and responsibilities, or fulfilling their own (sexual) preferences. Contrasting accounts, illustrative of how making an independent decision regarding marriage facilitated gender equality between spouses, will be presented in the second overarching theme.

Another distinct factor identified in our participants’ sexual histories as strengthening inequality of genders, was an authoritarian husband. He was often their first sexual partner with whom they would (or not) discover their sexuality. It was common for the husband to simply perpetuate the sexual double standard or even impose it on his sexually inexperienced wife, as described by Jolanta, who married the man she got pregnant with: ‘My husband was always very quick in bed and not very tactful. He had needs, and it was obvious when there had to be sex (…) He didn’t pay much attention to my needs’ (Jolanta, 66, Poland). They were still married at the time of the interview because, despite the failed sexual sphere of life, she considered him an overall good man (‘not drinking, never violent’) and a good father to their children. Comparable stories about male partners who were not gentle or caring, who simply demanded sexual intercourse with no interest in female pleasure or comfort, were common.

In several more extreme cases, husbands were recalled as verbally abusive if other men would notice their wife; unable to handle their jealousy, they would blame the wife for being a ‘tease’ or a ‘whore’. As in the previous generation, husbands often abused alcohol, as a 75-year-old divorcee Tanja straightforwardly put it: ‘My husband was an alcoholic, a bully, and a sex abuser. My father was also a bully, very similar to my husband’. (Tanja, 75, Croatia). Sexual encounters, usually in the form of vaginal intercourse, in marriages like Tanja’s were considered by both spouses a wife’s duty, regardless of how she felt about her husband. Over time, an abusive relationship would lead to an inability to enjoy sex and a gradual disappearance of any interest in sex, for example as recalled by an 84-year-old interviewee: ‘Especially when he [husband] was drunk (…) I was passive and frigid. Maybe I was becoming frigid, but I really did not feel ok when he approached me after drinking excessively. Everything would get ugly. I would lose any feelings and interest in sex’. (Branka, 84, Croatia). For Branka and several others, who shared similar stories, difficult or even traumatic experiences with their main sexual partner translated into long-term aversion to sex and physical closeness to men.

Within the marital context too, disadvantageous sexual experiences were often reported in relation to the daily economic struggle. The following example illustrates how for some women the main barrier to experiencing sexual satisfaction or even considering this aspect of life important were post-war economic hardship and the subsequent necessity for both spouses to focus on paid work. Milena, who got married at the age of 16, her parents arranged it, stated: ‘My husband and I worked like two maniacs; we never even went to town for a coffee as a couple. (…) He worked night shifts. I had no time for sex; I was always tired and lacking sleep’. (Milena, 64, Croatia). Although Milena did engage in procreation-oriented sex, she hardly recalled any time for leisure activities with her husband, such as sex as a pleasurable partnered activity. Her narrative resonates with other accounts of work-related exhaustion and chronic tiredness leaving little room for sexual interest and contact, often in both partners.

A more nuanced perspective can be found in the stories of women who have experienced the benefits of working and earning their living from an existential standpoint but have also noticed a notable limitation in their sexual fulfilment. After several years of marriage, Teresa, 65 when interviewed, divorced her husband who proved to be a womanizer, not supportive of her and their family: ‘I was educated, resourceful, I didn’t want to be treated like this by a man’. Teresa positioned herself as a woman who knew her worth and did not condone her husband’s gendered and disrespectful behaviour, also indicating that her education and employment did contribute to her decision. Yet, as a single mother, she had to provide for her children and in these words concluded her lack of interest in sex in her later years: ‘Please understand, I was raising two children by myself. And I was lucky to have my mother’s help. But work, children, and house –three full-time jobs! In the evening, I was falling asleep standing up. I didn’t have the strength to think of myself. There were some men hanging around because I was good-looking, but I couldn’t be bothered(…) The first time I caught myself thinking about a man, I was probably in my late 40 s’. (Teresa, 65, Poland) This and comparable narratives illustrate the complex interplay between independence in one aspect of life leading to the suppression of another. The fact that the trajectory of a woman-as-sexual-being has been in all cases markedly subordinate to that of a woman-as-mother may be in itself indicative of the entrenched traditional gender roles.

Gender Equality Actualized

The second main theme comprises our interviewees’ accounts of how, despite obstacles and overall sex-negative family socialization, gender equality found its way into their sexual lives. Advantageous experiences described in this theme revolve around finding a loving, gender-egalitarian, and supportive partner, intersected closely with a rebellious and non-conformist personality of some women, partially introduced by Theresa’s account presented above.

Being a ‘Rebellious’ Woman

Several interviewees suggested that it was their rebellious nature that helped them embrace their sexuality despite numerous obstacles. Vesna, a 71-year-old widow with a bilateral mastectomy reminisced about being different from a relatively young age: “I always enjoyed sex, since I was 16, all my life. (…) I was a little devil. At 18, I had a Vespa motorbike, long black hair cut in a ponytail, and everyone would notice me. I would have a boy behind me and ride that Vespa along the street. I mean, I was the one in charge […] I always wanted to be the dominant one” (Vesna, 71, Croatia). At the time of the interview, she was in a satisfying sexual relationship with a younger man.

Even if not as ‘rebellious’ as Vesna, several other women shared narratives about being determined to counter the sex-negative and restrictive perception of (female) sexuality they encountered while growing up. Anna, a 75-year-old widow, still in love with her late husband, recalled how she wanted a relationship based on a different foundation: ‘I was hungry for emotional closeness, tenderness; not like between my parents […] So I made a promise to myself that my marriage would be totally different: warm, full of closeness, hugging, and kissing’ (Anna, 75, Poland). She and other women who took such a stand did not rush into a marriage. Instead, they were determined to look for a partner who would appreciate them and present appropriate character traits. Rejecting marital candidates who failed to meet their standards was the first step toward countering the status quo.

Among women whose disadvantageous experiences in their first long-term relationship were presented in the previous main theme, there were some with non-conformist attitudes that manifested later in life. They narrated that, after initially conforming to the status quo and experiencing disappointing sex in marriage, in contrast to those interviewees who have completely withdrawn from sex life, they refused to give up and sought a solution. Ana, a 70-year-old divorcee with traumatic marital experiences claimed that she never stopped thinking that there must be more to sex than she had experienced: ‘I didn’t like how it was with my first husband. I always knew there must be more to it [sex]. So, I kept searching, trying’ (Ana, 70, Croatia). After her divorce, Ana had several lovers who helped her explore her sexuality. Divorce and the subsequent need to redefine emotional and sexual life provided Ana and the women with comparable experiences an opportunity to challenge and gradually dismantle the traditional expectations they grew up with.

Supportive and Egalitarian Partner

A supportive and loving partner played a central role in some of our interviewees’ narratives on advantageous sexual experiences. The context was almost invariably a relationship based on equality and respect, wherein a husband genuinely cared and loved his wife. Anna fondly reminisced: ‘He was handsome and gallant, good for me, and tender. He hugged me often, never cheated on me. He loved me more than anything’ (Anna, 75, Poland). In such relationships, women like Anna felt valued not only as mothers and housewives but foremostly as individuals, because their opinions were recognized and respected. Through small everyday gestures, such as discussing daily events or spending time with children, men demonstrated to their partners that they had an equal status in marriage.

Moreover, a loving relationship, like the one described by 65-year-old Marija, facilitated the change in women’s initially negative attitudes toward sex: ‘My parents would constantly repeat “Don’t do anything that would shame this house”. It was like brainwashing. But in my marriage, there was so much love. I wish it to everyone, all 25 years of my marriage. There was so much tenderness, attention…’ (Marija, 65, Croatia). Her compelling story illustrates how a relationship based on mutual care and affection had the power to dissolve sex-negative messages internalized during family socialization, what Marija retrospectively called ‘brainwashing’.

The empowerment and agency that Anna, Marija, and some other participants associated with their partner enabled them to communicate their sexual needs and wishes, for example, to directly demand affection or physical intimacy. Feeling secure and emotionally connected with their partner enabled these women to be more relaxed and agentic in sexual situations, opening a path to enjoyment. Together with their husbands, they kept sculpting the intimate relationship ‘on equal terms’.

In cases when the first marriage was full of disadvantageous experiences, breaking free from the confines of the internalized traditional gender roles required a longer time. Helena, who remarried at the age of 50, elaborated on how the process of opening up to new experiences, learning about her body and sexual pleasure took years: ‘I think that was the moment, in this second relationship, when I started to discover my body and my possibilities. I started noticing what gives me more or less pleasure, and we were able to talk about it. Before, this would have been impossible. I was 48; as it turned out, it was not too late (laugh)’ (Helena, 65, Poland). Her example shows how sexual gender equality could also be achieved later in life through the interplay of two factors: the non-conformist personality of a woman who, despite earlier disadvantageous experiences, did not give up in search of a better (sexual) life, and a supportive and gender-egalitarian partner with whom exploring, practising, and mastering the equality-based sex became possible.

Discussion

The Communist rule in Central, Eastern and South-Eastern Europe created a culture in which romantic relationships were proclaimed to be based on love and ‘freed from market influences’ (Ghodsee, 2018, p. 20; Lišková, 2018). Some recent studies suggested that this ideological emphasis on gender equality, as well as structural changes such as free public education, mass employment, and progressive laws on divorce and abortion, may have positively affected women’s sexual agency and sexual expression under state socialism (Ghodsee, 2018). By analyzing the sexual trajectories of Polish and Croatian women who spent their formative years under state socialism, the current study finds limited support for such an interpretation (Bucur, 2022).

Although the state-socialist ideology was rife with revolutionary narratives about gender equality in the public domain, which was supposed to also spread to the private sphere, almost all participants described their primary socialization as markedly patriarchal, sexually conservative, and highly gendered (see also: Ignaciuk & Jarska, 2023; Kościańska, 2016; Mikołajczak & Pietrzak, 2015). Consistent with Lišková et al.’s (2020) observation that sexual abstinence and moral self-discipline were expected of young women, our participants’ growing up was saturated with narratives about the perils of sex and a drastic gap between how men and women perceive and desire sex. This contributed to the development of a largely negative perspective on sex and sexuality, as something inherently problematic and even dangerous (Ignaciuk & Jarska, 2023). It resonates with Temkina and Zdravomyslova’s (2015) findings on restrictive parental (and state) teachings and suppression of sexuality experienced by Russian-speaking women of the so-called ‘silent generation’ and their associated negative attitudes toward sexuality. We would suggest that these cumulating disadvantageous experiences spanning from childhood to late adolescence have, in many cases, affected young women’s sexual autonomy, restricted their sexual expectations and affected their psychological capacity to enjoy sex—in some cases, for decades (Sanchez et al., 2012; Warner et al., 2020). Our participants’ accounts of how the ideas and norms about sex that they internalized prevented them from enjoying the sexual aspect of life support Laan et al.’s (2021) claim that gender differences in sexual pleasure stem from differences in opportunities rather than capacity, with sociocultural factors playing a crucial role in shaping the opportunities.

The current study highlights a complex relationship between modernizing socialist efforts and the official ideology of gender equality on the one hand, and problematic socioeconomic reality and lingering patriarchal tradition in the private sphere on the other hand, altogether challenging optimistic interpretations of the economic liberation of female sexuality under socialism. In addition to the mixture of (often manifest) socialist puritanism and (mostly latent) religious moral conservativism, stress and exhaustion related to the ‘triple burden’ of paid work, household maintenance, and child-rearing seemed to have effectively hindered some women’s (sexual) self-realization. In fact, the state benefits for single mothers, which intensified during the return to more traditional values and pro-natalist policies of the 1960s and 1970s (Herzog, 2011), seemed to encourage the traditional division of gender roles by emphasizing the hardship of single motherhood more than they promoted women’s independence and self-realization.

In addition, our analysis identified marital trajectories as another important source of (dis)advantageous experiences in the interviewees’ sex life. Corresponding with the observation that sexual scripts ‘are not a given but require maintenance and reinforcement at personal and dyadic levels to persist’ (Masters et al., 2013: 410), traditional sexual scripts were often continuously enacted at the interpersonal level. In many marriages described in this study, women were in a subordinate position, with the husband implicitly reinforcing their sexual rights and restricting their wives’ sexual agency, which strongly resonates with older Russian women’s life stories of gender inequality and objectification in marriage (Temkina & Zdravomyslova, 2015). This can be understood as a reflection of the sexual double standard –a specific regulation of women’s sexuality observed across societies (Crawford & Popp, 2003; Elliott & Umberson, 2008), which posits that men and women have inherently different sexual needs (Gal & Kligman, 2000). This double standard re-emerged in socialist Poland and Croatia as the initial enchantment with gender egalitarian ideals began to fade. Unsurprisingly, adhering to the pressure of the sexual double standard (less sexual freedom for women than men, and women being stigmatized for engaging in premarital or extramarital sex or even initiating sex; see: Crawford & Popp, 2003; Sagebin Bordini & Sperb, 2013) was shown to be problematic for women’s ability to have fulfilling sexual experiences (Sanchez et al., 2012), as observed in the current study. At a more fundamental level, in the cases of abusive relationships—not uncommon at the time—gender inequality was acutely experienced by women at the level of basic human rights, let alone equality in terms of sexual life.

For a small number of women, whose sexual explorations and agency clearly distinguished them from the rest of our interviewees, it was either a rebellious personality or an egalitarian and caring husband or partner that made the difference. A few of them described a long history of daring and inquisitive personality that defied patriarchal rules and social expectations. Sexual explorations and the development of sexual agency were an act of defiance and a subversion of the dominant social norms (Thorpe, 2019)—especially the sexual double standard. In other cases, finding a loving and supportive partner enabled sexual awakening and enjoyment. Although leading to similar outcomes, the two pathways are distinct: the first reflects the success of a rebellious intrapersonal sexual script in neutralizing normative expectations and restrictions, and the second depicts the liberating potential of gender-egalitarian interpersonal sexual scripting (Masters et al., 2013). Both the ‘rebel’ and the ‘supportive partner’ narratives point us toward acknowledging the oft-neglected importance of personal and interpersonal dynamics in understanding the relation between female sexuality and sociocultural norms.

Our findings suggest that real gender equality, despite official proclamations, was somewhat missing in the private sphere of female sexuality in post-WWII Croatia and Poland. This has not been observed uniformly in all European socialist countries (see, for example, Bělehradová & Lišková, 2021; Ghodsee, 2018; McLellan, 2011). Leaving aside differences in scholarly methods and sample demographics, some of the differences between our study’s findings and prior research may be due to a strong Roman Catholic tradition of Croatia and Poland that both pre-dates and has successfully outlived the Communist rule (Kościańska, 2021; Luijkx et al., 2017; Ramet, 1989). In contrast, Eastern parts of Germany and Czechoslovakia remained highly secular (Luijkx et al., 2017). The religious tradition has been found to perpetuate patriarchal norms and the sexual double standard, as they are perceived as compatible with traditional Catholic morality and teachings on gender roles (Endendijk et al., 2019; Horntrich, 2020; Mikołajczak & Pietrzak, 2015).

Study Limitations

In addition to the religious aspect, it borders with truism to note that state socialism did not impact all European countries in the same way, which was primarily due to differences in socioeconomic conditions before WWII and the degree of control the Soviet Union was able to exert of the country and its Communist leadership. Moreover, it should be reiterated that gender expectations did not remain static throughout the four decades of socialist rule. During the 1970s and 1980s, most socialist countries in Europe experienced occasional periods of (socio-cultural and economic) liberalization, intertwined with the return to family values and re-introduction of gender-conservative regulations, thus adding another layer of differentiation between the countries in question (Temkina & Zdravomyslova, 2015). Consequently, our analysis is limited to the two countries under investigation and the generations of women whose sexually formative years coincided with the “iron times” of the Communist rule in the 1950s and 1960s. However, given many political and economic similarities of life behind the Iron Curtain, we would be careful in rejecting the relevance of our insights for scholarly understanding of female sexuality in other communist countries.

Our study relied on retrospective accounts of older women about their sexual history. While this approach is vulnerable to both memory and social desirability biases, retrospective accounts can also enable a better (fuller) understanding of personal experiences and—particularly in the case of details that are not of paramount importance—provide a more rounded autobiographical narrative. It should be noted that all our interviewees seemed to be highly motivated to participate in the study about ageing and sexuality (there was little or no extrinsic motivation for participation), which explains their good rapport with the interviewers, frequently mentioned during informal post-interview conversations.

Conclusion and Recommendations for Future Research

Following the life course framework of gendered sexuality (Carpenter, 2010), this study delved into intersecting (dis)advantageous experiences in the narratives of older Croatian and Polish women. It aimed to capture their experiences of and perspectives on gender (in)equality during the state socialist era, focusing on their private life. The narratives shared by interviewees highlighted disadvantageous experiences rooted in two main areas: sex-negative family socialization during childhood and adolescence, and the perpetuation of sexual inequalities within marital relationships. Conversely, advantageous experiences, often accrued later in life, were linked to the nonconformist personalities of some women and the positive influence of a supportive, gender-egalitarian partner.

Our analysis suggests that female sexuality is not a passive reflection of dominant social norms, but a complex process of negotiating personal, family, partner and community expectations and socioeconomic pressures across public and private domains (Thorpe, 2019). In our sample of older Polish and Croatian women, this process was often characterized by the accumulation of disadvantageous sexual/erotic, as well as emotional, experiences, which in some cases resulted in relinquishing sex life or experiencing sexual pleasure only much later in life (see also: Gore-Gorszewska, 2021). In most cases, it was a combination of the post-war economic hardship and the gender non-egalitarian order that limited female opportunities for sexual expression and pleasure. The implications of these macro–micro links are still relevant for heterosexual relationships and female sexual health and satisfaction (Laan et al., 2021), particularly when contemporary anti-gender movements in Europe are considered (Kuhar & Paternotte, 2018; Norocel & Paternotte, 2023).

While macro factors such as changes in cultural norms (e.g., liberalization and secularization; Scott, 1998), political ideology, demographic shifts, and economic development can, directly and indirectly, affect female sexual agency (Endendijk et al., 2019), this study’s findings underscore the substantial role of personal and interpersonal dynamics. The nonconformist personality observed in some women’s narratives enabled countering of sex-negative family transmissions and facilitated rejecting traditional gender roles and norms, thereby supporting women’s empowerment to navigate their sexual lives on their own terms. Additionally, the presence of a supportive partner—whether the first partner or one acquired later in life through re-partnering—can provide emotional validation, respect, and encouragement for self-expression, ultimately affecting a woman’s sense of agency and autonomy in sexual matters. Although the current study is retrospective and limited to a specific time and cultural context, our findings may resonate with the lived experiences of women in other non-egalitarian societies where patriarchal and gendered norms still dominate women’s intimate lives.

Further research is needed to illuminate the complex topic of sexual interactions under state socialism (Bucur, 2022). What is particularly needed are more detailed explorations of the nuanced interplay between religious norms and values, operating (often in silence) behind the official political ideology, and female sexual agency under communist rule in Europe, but also male narratives about (hetero)sexual expression in this period. The examination of male perspectives on gender (in)equality in state socialism may provide valuable insights into different dyadic dynamics with, possibly, substantially different emotional and sexual outcomes (for the female partner). The macro–micro links explored in our study cannot be fully understood without the assessment of couple interactions and the mutual shaping of intimate life within a specific ideological and socioeconomic context. In general, research on human sexuality would benefit from more insights about the web of connections between individual and couple sexual expression on the one hand and the dynamics of their social environment on the other hand.