Skip to main content
SpringerLink
Log in

The Experience of Relationship Dissolution among British South Asian Gay Men: Identity Threat and Protection

  • Published:
Sexuality Research and Social Policy Aims and scope Submit manuscript

Abstract

Relationship dissolution has generally been associated with decreased psychological well-being, but little is known about how ethnic and religious minority gay men experience and cope with relationship dissolution. This article examines interview data from sixteen self-identified British South Asian gay men who provided insights into how they experienced and coped with relationship dissolution and into the potential effects of this for identity. Data were analyzed qualitatively using interpretative phenomenological analysis and identity process theory. The following themes are outlined: (i) constructing identity around the relationship; (ii) relationship breakdown and threats to identity; and (iii) repairing identity in silence. The data indicate the centrality of the relationship to identity because of its ability to enhance identity processes and the detrimental effect for identity processes that dissolution can therefore have. Individuals relied heavily upon intrapsychic, deflection strategies for coping with identity threat, which was due to a general lack of social support. Minority group members who are fearful of disclosing their sexual identity to others may cope inadequately with relationship dissolution, exposing identity to chronic threat.

This is a preview of subscription content, log in via an institution to check access.

Access this article

Log in via an institution

Price excludes VAT (USA)
Tax calculation will be finalised during checkout.

Instant access to the full article PDF.

Institutional subscriptions

Similar content being viewed by others

References

  • Amato, P. R. (2000). The consequences of divorce for adults and children. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 62, 1269–1288.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Bassi, C. (2006). Riding the dialectical waves of gay political economy: a story from Birmingham’s commercial gay scene. Antipode: A Radical Journal of Geography, 38(2), 213–235.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Bassi, C. (2008). The precarious and contradictory moments of existence for an emergent British Asian gay culture. In C. Dwyer & C. Bressey (Eds.), New geographies of race and racism (pp. 209–222). Farnham: Ashgate.

    Google Scholar 

  • Battle, J., & DeFreece, J. (2014). The impact of community involvement, Religion, and spirituality on happiness and health among a National sample of black Lesbians. Women, Gender & Families of Color, 2(1), 1–31.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Berscheid, E., & Reis, H. T. (1998). Attraction and close relationships. In D. T. Gilbert, S. T. Fiske, & G. Lindzey (Eds.), The handbook of social psychology (4th ed., pp. 193–281). New York: McGraw Hill.

    Google Scholar 

  • Bowleg, L. (2013). “Once you’ve blended the cake, you can’t take the parts back to the main ingredients”: black gay and bisexual men’s descriptions and experiences of intersectionality. Sex Roles, 68(11–12), 754–767.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Breakwell, G. M. (1986). Coping with threatened identities. London: Methuen.

    Google Scholar 

  • Brennan, & Bosson. (1998). Attachment-style differences in attitudes toward and reactions to feedback from romantic partners: an exploration of the relational bases of self-esteem. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 24(7), 699–714.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Carver, C. S., Scheier, M. F., & Weintraub, J. K. (1989). Assessing coping strategies: a theoretically based approach. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 56(2), 267–283.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • CBC News (2005). World Sikh group against marriage bill. CBC News. 29 March 2005 http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/story/2005/03/28/sikhguy-050328.html.

  • Chaney, C., & Patrick, L. (2010). The invisibility of LGBT individuals in black mega churches: political and social implications. Journal of African American Studies, 15(2), 199–217.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Chung, M. C., Farmer, S., Grant, K., Newton, R., Payne, S., Perry, M., Saunders, J., Smith, C., & Stone, N. (2003). Coping with post-traumatic stress symptoms following relationship dissolution. Stress and Health, 19, 27–36.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • David, D., Shaver, P. R., & Vernon, M. L. (2003). Physical, emotional, and behavioral reactions to breaking up: the roles of gender, age, emotional involvement, and attachment style. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 29(7), 871–884.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Duran, K. (1993). Homosexuality in Islam. In A. Swidler (Ed.), Homosexuality and world religions (pp. 181–198). Harrisburg: Trinity Press.

    Google Scholar 

  • Elliot, G. C., Rosenberg, M., & Wagner, M. (1984). Transient depersonalisation in youth. Social Psychology Quarterly, 47, 115–129.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Fine, M. A., & Sacher, J. A. (1997). Predictors of distress following relationship termination among dating couples. Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology, 16, 381–388.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Fingerhut, A. W., & Maisel, N. C. (2010). Relationship formalization and individual and relationship well-being among same-sex couples. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 27, 956–969.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Frazier, P. A., & Cook, S. W. (1993). Correlates of distress following heterosexual relationship dissolution. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 10, 55–67.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Furman, W. (2002). The emerging field of adolescent romantic relationships. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 11(5), 177–180.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Ghuman, P. A. S. (2003). Double loyalties: South Asian adolescents in the West. Cardiff: University of Wales Press.

    Google Scholar 

  • Huston, T. L., Niehuiss, S., & Smith, S. E. (2001). The early marital roots of conjugal distress and divorce. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 10(4), 116–119.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Jaspal, R. (2012). Coping with religious and cultural homophobia: emotion and narratives of identity threat from British Muslim gay men. In P. Nynäs & A. K. T. Yip (Eds.), Religion, gender and sexuality in everyday life (pp. 71–90). Farnham: Ashgate.

    Google Scholar 

  • Jaspal, R. (2014). Arranged marriage, identity and psychological wellbeing among British Asian gay men. Journal of GLBT Family Studies, 10(5), 425–448.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Jaspal, R., & Breakwell, G. M. (Eds.). (2014). Identity process theory: identity, social action and social change. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press.

    Google Scholar 

  • Jaspal, R., & Cinnirella, M. (2010). Coping with potentially incompatible identities: accounts of religious, ethnic and sexual identities from British Pakistani men who identify as Muslim and gay. British Journal of Social Psychology, 49(4), 849–870.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Jaspal, R., & Cinnirella, M. (2012). Identity processes, threat and interpersonal relations: accounts from British Muslim gay men. Journal of Homosexuality, 59(2), 215–240.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Jaspal, R., & Cinnirella, M. (2014). Hyper-affiliation to the Religious Ingroup among British Pakistani Muslim Gay Men. Journal of Community and Applied Social Psychology, 24(4), 265–277.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Jaspal, R., & Siraj, A. (2011). Perceptions of ‘coming out’ among British Muslim gay men. Psychology and Sexuality, 2(3), 183–197.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Jeffries, W. L., Dodge, B., & Sandfort, T. G. M. (2008). Religion and spirituality among bisexual Black men in the USA. Culture, Health & Sexuality, 10(5), 463–477.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Kessler, R., Price, R., & Wortman, C. (1985). Social factors in psychopathology: stress, social support and coping processes. Annual Review of Psychology, 36, 531–572.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Kurdek, L. A. (2004). Are gay and lesbian cohabiting couples really different from heterosexual married couples? Journal of Marriage and Family, 66, 880–900.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Kurdek, L. A. (2006). Differences between partners from heterosexual, gay and lesbian cohabiting couples. Journal of Marriage and Family, 68, 509–528.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Lagrand, L. E. (1988). Changing patterns of human existence: assumptions, beliefs, and coping with the stress of change. Springfield: Charles C. Thomas Publisher.

    Google Scholar 

  • Markowe, L. A. (1996). Redefining the self: coming out as lesbian. Cambridge: Polity Press.

    Google Scholar 

  • Markus, H., & Nurius, P. (1986). Possible selves. American Psychologist, 41, 954–969.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Medford, N., Sierra, M., Baker, D. & David, A.S. (2005). Understanding and treating depersonalisation disorder. 11, 92–100.

  • Mohr, J. J., & Fassinger, R. E. (2006). Sexual orientation identity and romantic relationship quality in same-sex couples. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 32(8), 1085–1099.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Murray, S. O. (1997). The will not to know: Islamic accommodations of male homosexuality. In S. O. Murray & W. Roscoe (Eds.), Islamic homosexualities: culture, history and literature (pp. 14–54). New York: New York University Press.

    Google Scholar 

  • Park, L. E., Sanchez, D. T., & Brynildsen, K. (2011). Maladaptive responses to relationship dissolution: the role of relationship contingent self-worth. Journal of Applied Social Psychology, 41(7), 1749–1773.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Peplau, L. A., & Fingerhut, A. W. (2007). The close relationship of lesbians and gay men. Annual Review of Psychology, 58, 405–424.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Pitt, R. N. (2010). “Killing the messenger”: religious black gay men’s neutralization of anti-gay religious messages. Journal for the Scientific Study of Religion, 49(1), 56–72.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Rhoades, G. K., Dush, C. M. K., Atkins, D. C., Stanley, S. M., & Markman, H. J. (2011). Breaking up is hard to do: the impact of unmarried relationship dissolution on mental health and life satisfaction. Journal of Family Psychology, 25(3), 366–374.

    Article  PubMed Central  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Schmitt, J.P., & Kurdek, L.A. (1987). Personality correlates of positive identity and relationship involvement in gay men. Journal of Homosexuality, 13, 101–109.

  • Smith, J. A., & Osborn, M. (2008). Interpretative phenomenological analysis. In J. A. Smith (Ed.), Qualitative psychology: a practical guide to methods (pp. 53–80). London: Sage.

    Google Scholar 

  • Sprecher, S. (1994). Two sides to the breakup of dating relationships. Personal Relationships, 1, 199–222.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Tashiro, T., & Frazier, P. (2003). “I’ll never be in a relationship like that again”: personal growth following romantic relationship breakups. Personal Relationships, 10, 113–128.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Turner, R. H. (1975). Is there a quest for identity? The Sociological Quarterly, 16, 148–161.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Turner, R. H. (1976). The real self: from institution to impulse. American Journal of Sociology, 81, 989–1016.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Vannini, P., & Franzese, A. (2008). Authenticity of self: conceptualization, personal experience, and practice. Sociology Compass, 2(5), 1621–1637.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Walker, J. J., & Longmire-Avital, B. (2013). The impact of religious faith and internalized homonegativity on resiliency for black lesbian, gay, and bisexual emerging adults. Developmental Psychology, 49(9), 1723–1731.

    Article  PubMed  Google Scholar 

  • Ward, E. G. (2005). Homophobia, hypermasculinity and the US black church. Culture, Health & Sexuality, 7(5), 493–504.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Yip, A. K. T. (2004). Negotiating space with family and kin in identity construction: the narratives of British non-heterosexual Muslims. Sociological Review, 52, 336–350.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Yip, A. K. T. (2005). Queering religious texts: an exploration of British, non-heterosexual Christians’ and Muslims’ strategy of constructing sexuality-affirming hermeneutics. Sociology, 39, 47–65.

    Article  Google Scholar 

  • Yip, A. K. T. (2007). Sexual orientation discrimination in religious communities. In M. V. L. Badgett & J. Frank (Eds.), Sexual orientation discrimination: an international perspective (pp. 209–244). London: Routledge.

    Google Scholar 

Download references

Author information

Authors and Affiliations

  1. Self & Identity Research Group, Faculty of Health and Life Sciences, De Montfort University, Leicester, LE1-9BH, UK

    Rusi Jaspal

Authors
  1. Rusi Jaspal
    View author publications

    You can also search for this author in PubMed Google Scholar

Corresponding author

Correspondence to Rusi Jaspal.

Rights and permissions

Reprints and permissions

About this article

Check for updates. Verify currency and authenticity via CrossMark

Cite this article

Jaspal, R. The Experience of Relationship Dissolution among British South Asian Gay Men: Identity Threat and Protection. Sex Res Soc Policy 12, 34–46 (2015). https://doi.org/10.1007/s13178-014-0175-4

Download citation

  • Published:

  • Issue Date:

  • DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s13178-014-0175-4

Keywords

Search

Navigation