“Don’t Think I’m Soft”

Abstract

Since the late nineteenth century, the military had tried to instill in soldiers the sense that they were part of a new “family”—their military unit—which provided them emotional comfort, and the army emphasized that their primary bond was to their unit rather than their family of origin.¹ Despite this expectation, men continued to seek emotional support from home. As the war dragged on, letters between soldiers and their families became a lifeline between men and women separated and suffering under hardships on the combat and home fronts. This chapter focuses on letters written by front soldiers, and it explores how soldiers described the emotional and psychological effects of the war to their wives, girlfriends, and families. What did they reveal and conceal about their emotional experiences at the front? How did they perceive themselves in relation to prevailing masculine ideals? How did they characterize the physical and psychological impact of mass violence to their loved ones at home?