Present and Absent: Women at Greco-Roman Wedding Meals

Abstract

Although our focus on Greco-Roman meals leads us inevitably to the dining room, we begin this particular journey in another place. The three narratives that follow remind us that when considering early Jewish and Christian wedding meals we need to consider the bridal chamber as well. First from Tobit, as Sarah, the bride, awaits her eighth groom, having already lost seven grooms to a demon: Raguel called his wife Edna and said to her “Sister, get the other room ready and take her there.” So she went and made the bed in the room as he told her and brought Sarah there. She wept for her daughter. Then wiping away tears she said to her, “Take courage, my daughter; the Lord of heaven grant you joy in place of your sorrow. Take courage, my daughter.” Then she went out. When they had finished eating and drinking they wanted to retire; so they took the young man and brought him into the bedroom.² Edna settles her daughter then leaves the wedding chamber. Does she join the feast? It is hard to say. In the apocryphal Acts of Thomas the bride and the groom already occupy the wedding chamber when the king comes to the apostle:

Raguel called his wife Edna and said to her “Sister, get the other room ready and take her there.” So she went and made the bed in the room as he told her and brought Sarah there. She wept for her daughter. Then wiping away tears she said to her, “Take courage, my daughter; the Lord of heaven grant you joy in place of your sorrow. Take courage, my daughter.” Then she went out. When they had finished eating and drinking they wanted to retire; so they took the young man and brought him into the bedroom.

I wish to thank Debra Bucher for her insightful and helpful comments on an earlier draft of this paper; my former student, Emma Cawlfield, for logistical help; and Hal Taussig and Dennis Smith for their editing and their lead.