Family Values

Abstract

Values are what they are. We believe in them. We assert them. But we do not think much about them. When we assert them, we say what they are; we speak the words:

Children are shaped by communities. Responsibility requires serving and shaping your community. That requires cooperation. (Lakoff 2004b)

Community, responsibility, cooperation—these are our values. When we assert our values, we do not invite discussion. Shaped in what sense? What is a community? Are children well-shaped by communities, or would it be better to do it another way? Are adults well-made when as children they are subject to this process called shaping? What are we saying when we use the term “responsibility” without indicating what it is we are responsible for? The way we speak about our values tells us and those we speak to not to ask questions such as these.