Awareness and Aloneness as Foundations of Love and Friendship

Abstract

It is said that man is born alone and dies alone. No one can live his life for him. No one can die his death for him. But in between one can create various illusions in an attempt to escape from aloneness. This paper discusses how such futile attempts can actually be hindering the beautiful love and soulful relationships humans are longing for. It outlines the challenges one must go through, i.e., confronting precisely the existential fact of aloneness; waking up to some profound realizations about oneself, one’s hang-ups, and the various obstacles to loving and cultivating authentic relationships. It also shows that while there is a deep need to connect and feel connected with another being, this need or being needy is actually counterproductive, and will instead create problems and tensions and forms of imprisonment. While needs can help maintain so many relationships, it is not need that will keep the authentic fire and soulful connection between human beings. One is, therefore, challenged to transcend neediness, to confront fear of aloneness and loneliness, to become aware of the many projections and hindrances we set up, to learn and embrace independence, so that one can usher in the experience of a truly wonderful and soul-fulfilling relationship with another.