Ukushela: Teenage Girls and Boys Negotiating Courtship at School

Abstract

Drawing from an ethnographic study which explored informal sexual cultures amongst teenagers in a township high school in KwaZulu-Natal, this chapter shows how teenagers negotiated courtship or ukushela as they constructed femininities and masculinities. Ukushela is a Zulu cultural norm based on gender binaries which legitimatize male power in courtship rituals. This chapter addresses teenagers’ own perspectives on ukushela. When teenagers talked about initiating heterosexual relationships, they both contested and reproduced dominant notions of male sexual power and male privilege during ukushela. The chapter demonstrates that both boys and girls actively produced gender and sexuality as they negotiated the right to initiate boyfriend–girlfriend relationships (or ukushela). While girls advanced their sexual agency by defying cultural norms associated with ukushela, thus creating some space for gender equality, once a girl accepted a proposal to enter into a relationship (ukuqoma), dominant patterns around male power tended to shape that relationship, resulting in girls’ subordination. We conclude by highlighting the need for sexuality education that takes heed of teenagers’ active investment in heterosexual relationships, and the cultural norms through which such relationships are pursued.