Explaining Mental Retardation and Autism to Parents

Abstract

To be told that his or her child has a serious disability is one of the most painful experiences in a parent’s life. Numerous articles by parents eloquently describe the feelings of despair, anger, shock, or fear that the news of the child’s diagnosis precipitated (Massie and Massie, 1976; Murray and Murray, 1975; Shigley, 1980; Turnbull and Turnbull, 1978; Wolfensberger and Kurtz, 1969). Some of the distress that learning their child has a serious disability causes parents is unavoidable. Parents must grieve the loss of the hoped-for normal child, and the normal grief process is often lengthy and painful. Some pain is unnecessary, however; this is the pain caused by thoughtless or unskilled professionals. Unfortunately, many parents have described experiences of being told abruptly, coldly, or superficially about their child’s disabilities and future potential.