For the interviewees, Facebook was perceived as a complex phenomenon. In some cases, it meant carefully considering how they expressed their views about being subjected to the same policing and constraints they experience in their offline world. Others saw it as providing them with opportunities to express themselves more freely. I discuss these two main orientations (see Table 1) that emerged from the data under the headings (1) Gender identities and Facebook as an extension of social/physical reality and (2) Gender identities and Facebook as a platform for change and agency. It should, however, be noted that the above-mentioned orientations are not mutually exclusive but often overlap. They are linked by the shame and honour based strategies that are used to silence subversive voices in Pakistan . The notions of shame and honour form the basis for what is considered appropriate conduct, especially the sexual conduct of women, which is seen to reflect upon the status of male relatives, thereby sanctioning a society in which power is unequally distributed [58, 70]. In such a social set-up, “male honour and shame becomes intrinsically bound with men’s ability to control the sexuality and body of women associated with them” (, p.35–36).
Gender Identities and Facebook as an Extension of Social/ Physical Reality
In this section, I discuss how some of the interviewees highlighted the ways in which Facebook plays a crucial role in perpetuating the existing gender ideology. Their views were more or less conservative in nature. These interviewees indicated that life in cyberspace differs little from their day-to-day lives. For example, they stated that even on Facebook, their freedom to express themselves is limited, and they are forced to conform to the dominant patriarchal notions of masculinity and femininity. For instance, they reported that in their online and offline lives, religious discourse is one of the most common strategies used to pressurize men and women to adhere to the established gender order. Similarly, they referred to online sexual harassment and public opinion as other significant tactics used to regulate men and women’s behaviour in Pakistani society.
Gender Policing through Instrumentalisation of Religious Discourse
According to the interviewees, the most common strategy employed in Pakistani society to ensure compliance with the dominant gender norms is to rely on the prevalent socio-religious ideologies of Pakistan. Extract 1 typifies such a position:
Excerpt 1 (Male Interviewee 1, Original Interview in Urdu)
Social Media and Facebook is bringing a negative change. It is spreading ‘beyhayaie’ (shamelessness/vulgarity) in our society. Before its popularity, ‘beyhayaie’ (shamelessness) was not so common. You remember what happened in Aurat March (Women March) where women were holding such shameful and objectionable banners? I feel those are completely against our religious and cultural norms… especially banners like ‘Mera jism meri marzi’ (My body, my choice) were shameful as it was women who were displaying it. Sorry to say it but this slogan only meant one thing that is women want the freedom to have sex like men. Social media is feeding this insanity in our Islamic culture.
This interviewee voices a conservative stance, condemning social media for triggering an unwelcome change into Pakistani society. He sees this as done through the provision of a platform for potentially unpoliced heterogeneous voices and non-conformist views that potentially endanger the existing gender hierarchy. He argues that before the popularity of social media, shamelessness was not visible in Pakistani culture. Now, however, social media are destroying the natural fabric of Pakistani culture by estranging Pakistani men and women from their Islamic morality and cultural values. In doing so, he twice uses of the word “beyhayaie” (shamelessness/vulgarity) to refer to social media (it is spreading “beyhayaie”), thus emphasizing his view. To further reinforce the dominant gender hierarchy, he then strategically connects the concept of shamelessness with the women who stepped out of their homes (…shameful as it was women who were displaying it) to protest against gender inequality in Pakistan. The use of the term beyhayaie (shamelessness) is significant here, as the concept of shame in patriarchal societies is often used, as by this interviewee, as a disciplinary strategy to regulate behaviour, especially that of women . For him, shame is a surveillance tool that can help maintain the ideal concept of ‘respectable’ femininity. In cultures like Pakistan, it is common male practice to use notions like shame and honour to pressure women to adhere to the culturally accepted model of femininity . Moreover, the term beyhayaie has strong religious connotations .
He further validates this stance by referring to “Aurat March” (Women March), quoting one of its most widely cited and controversial slogans [Mera jism, meri marzi (My body, my choice)]. This slogan was the topic of many heated critical debates on social media as well as on mainstream private Pakistani television channels. The interviewee’s statement “especially banners like “Mera jism meri marzi” (My body, my choice) were really shameful as it was women who were displaying it” is particularly noteworthy here, since it seems to explicitly perpetuate men’s expectations of appropriate female behaviour. Moreover, his use of the pronoun our is interesting: he uses it for three main purposes. First, in talking about our society, our religious and cultural values, and our Islamic culture, he strives to emphasize a sense of belonging, pride, and appreciation of traditional Pakistani culture. Second, he is not only voicing a sense of solidarity and togetherness but also trying to represent the collective consciousness of the Pakistanis who reject “Aurat March” and any subsequent public discussion of women rights on- or offline. Finally, he also seems to be seeking the sympathy and support of the interviewer (since she belongs to the same culture). Of particular interest in this excerpt are the two claims against “Aurat March”, i.e., that it is an assault on cultural and religious values (I feel those are completely against our religious and cultural norms). However, towards the end of the excerpt he equates culture with Islam (social media is feeding this insanity in our Islamic culture). Thus, he cojoins culture and religion and implies that Aurat March is fundamentally an attack on Islamic values. Thus, this excerpt highlights the close association between culture, religion and, in particular, women’s bodies.
Some of the female interviewees also instrumentalised religious and cultural discourses to show their conformity with the Pakistani patriarchal ideology. Excerpt 2 is a typical example. Here a female interviewee points out that Facebook (and other social media platforms) are the root cause of the spread of ‘evil’ in contemporary Pakistani society.
Excerpt 2 (Female Interviewee 1; Interview in Urdu and English)
Discussing gender issues on Facebook is not the right forum because for me these issues are a private matter and discussing such things so publicly on social media will only create a rift between men and women in our society. You see everything in that obnoxious Aurat March was broadcast to the nation thanks to Facebook; it (social media) has become such an evil thing. We live in the Islamic Republic of Pakistan and holding up those placards in public is like you are bringing dishonour to your family, cultural and religious values.
While talking about the negative influence of social media in general and Facebook in particular, the interviewee calls social media an “evil thing”. Like the male interviewee cited above, she justifies her stance by referring to the Facebook discussion on Aurat March. She condemns debates on gender issues by calling them a “private matter” that should not be discussed in public. As shown by her use of the word “broadcast,” she considers the Facebook discussion on “Aurat March” to be part of an external agenda designed to destroy the existing socio-religious norms of Pakistani society and hence “an evil thing”. Her use of first-person pronouns, as in “for me”, “our society” and “we live in” creates a division between those against and those for Aurat March. On the one hand, the use of “we” indicates her pride in Islamic cultural values. On the other hand, she also cites religion to justify her stance that public debate on gender issues in is unacceptable in Pakistan. This is because raising private issues in the public domain is generally condemned in Pakistani society . Also interesting is her use of the terms “private” and “public to show her alignment with the ways in which Pakistani culture assigns the public domain—power, status, control of information and decision making—to men, and the private domain—helplessness, domestic chores, dependence on male kin—to women .
Online Sexual Harassment: A Mechanism for Silencing Subversive Voices
According to the interviewees, another common strategy used to regulate men’s and women’s behaviour on Pakistani Facebook is online sexual harassment. The interviewees, women, in particular, repeatedly point out that, whenever they voice their opinion about women or gender issues, they are subjected to sexual harassment and even receive threats against their lives. These were posted either in the comment sections of their homepage or inboxed directly to them. For instance, one female interviewee, who actively makes and shares sarcastic videos about gender stereotyping and women issues in Pakistan on Facebook, described her experience:
Excerpt 3 (Female Interviewee 2; Interview in English)
I have particularly received abuse and even rape threats from men. There is a group of incels who run pages with sexually explicit and demeaning content about women in general under the pretext of *dark humour*. It is also a group which happens to be very active and organized against most of the feminists’ content and movements on Facebook, and they tried their best to attack me as well. By posting sexist abusive memes, calling me a rundi (whore), photoshopping my face to someone’s naked body, all the usual tricks. They also tried to spam my page with similar abusive content in a planned and organized manner, which they call raids.
Excerpt 3 represents a progressive position in terms of gender issues in Pakistan. The interviewee achieves this linguistically by emphasizing herself as an individual agent targeted by her opponents (e.g., using pronouns “I” (I have particularly…), “me” (they tried their best to attack me as well) and “they”, (they also tried to…). These strategies allow her to position herself as a reformist who not only advocates gender equality but also challenges conventional gender roles. Thus, she is distancing herself from the traditional gender ideology of Pakistani society. In particular, she exposes self-motivated, traditionalist groups of men (incels: according to the Urban Dictionary, incels are members of an online community who are self-delusional, egoistic pretend to be a nice guy, blame others for their deprivation of sex or a romantic relationship, and often stereotype others, particularly women) who employ threats of violence to police, modulate and/or silence voices that question or (in their opinion) deconstruct established gender hierarchies. In doing so, the interviewee sketches the most typical strategies (all the usual tricks) that are employed by such men to curb progressive women's voices. She points out that, on Facebook, these men resort to misogynist verbal and visual abuse, often disguised as “dark humour”. In her view, these men regard creating abusive memes and sexually explicit and demeaning content and making rape threats as a harmless joke. She also describes how this kind of sexual harassment takes place in a systematic manner (They also tried to spam my page with similar abusive content in a planned and organized manner) to shape and control women voices on Facebook. She further states that this group of men methodically raid the profiles of women (…which happens to be very active and organized against most of the feminists’ content and movements on Facebook) who in their view, are guilty of violating the acceptable (and thereby respectable) model of passive femininity in Pakistan.
Online harassment is not, however, always limited to women alone but is also visible when men do not fit into the prescribed dominant gender mould. Excerpt (4) illustrates the views of such men. The interviewee identifies himself as a cisgender man who engages in activities that are regarded as gender transgressive. For example, he actively shares his makeup tutorial videos on Facebook and Instagram. As a result of he was picked on and beaten up by a group of men. In his interview, he describes a typical way in which threat and harassment operate when men do not subscribe to the traditional, heteronormative standards of masculinity. In his case, the threats and harassment did not remain verbal but manifested in physical action.
Excerpt 4 (Male Interviewee 2; Interview in English)
I am a cisgender and happy being a male yet I am proud of my femininity. I have had death threats over phone calls and in my dms (direct messages in Instagram). I get loads of phone calls and sometimes even prank messages that literally say that we are going to kill you. I know Pakistan is not flexible enough to digest people like me and this kind of transgression. I was studying at the university; some people came and beat me up just because they were not comfortable with my makeup tutorial videos on Facebook and Instagram. They had problems with my identity and what I represent. Therefore, it is not just an online thing. It is a very real physical trauma too.
This male interviewee detaches himself from the conventional masculine norms of Pakistani society. He describes how his transgressive masculinity, especially because it is linked with femininity, is considered threatening and intimidating. By making use of the active voice and personal pronouns (I am a cisgender…I know Pakistan is not flexible enough to digest people like me; they had problem with my identity) he, like the female interviewee above, is not only distancing himself from traditional gender beliefs but also manifests a more immediate and personal stance . His use of the word proud also shows his sense of achievement in consciously attempting to break free from the stereotypical masculine models in Pakistani society. Further, he narrates how he receives death threats (I have had death threats over phone calls and in my dms) and how he was beaten up (some people came and beat me up just because they were not comfortable with my makeup tutorial videos on Facebook and Instagram). Moreover, by stating “I know Pakistan is not flexible enough to digest people like me and this kind of transgression” and “it is not just an online thing. It is a very real physical trauma too” he draws attention not only to the rigid gender segregation but also to the non-acceptance of other forms of masculine and feminine expression in Pakistan. He seems fully aware of the dangers of deviating from the established gender norms and engaging in transgressive practices.
Gender Policing via Public Opinion: Loag Kiya Kahien Gay Syndrome (‘What will People say Syndrome’?)
According to the interviewees, another very common patriarchal custom is inculcating fear of public opinion. In their view, for a collectivist patriarchal system to function in Pakistan, it is paramount that men and women strictly follow the established gender models. This kind of ‘vigilantism show’ has also crept its way into online social media platforms, as exemplified by one of the female participants:
Excerpt 5 (Female Interviewee 3; Interview in English)
People keep a constant tab even on Facebook. I remember when I shared my pictures in which I was sitting with a biker man in the US; those pictures created such havoc and people even went to the extent of saying that I am no longer eligible to be married because of those pictures. They even called me a gashti (slut). Nevertheless, people are always going to judge you no matter what you do or don’t do.
Excerpt 5 highlights how this female interviewee is not only morally policed on Facebook for transgressing expected feminine behaviour but also how other people’s opinions are premeditated to induce feelings of shame and guilt in deviant individuals. She validates her view by narrating how she posted pictures of herself with a biker on Facebook during a trip to the United States that resulted in her being judged as a “gashti” (slut) (They even called me a gashti) and not suitable for marriage. She starts with the word “people” (People keep a constant tab even on Facebook), that directly translates into the Urdu word “loag” to refer to people collectively in and outside of her circle of family and friends who are involved in publicly policing women. Of interest here is her use of the phrase even on Facebook, demonstrating that such moral policing and monitoring is not limited to the real physical world but has also infiltrated the digital social world, as also observed in social media research . Moreover, she uses the phrase “created havoc” to emphasize her mental state when people tried to morally reproach her for her transgressive behaviour.
She further describes the two most typical strategies people use to pressure women to adhere to the stereotypical feminine models. The first is to label them as unworthy of marriage. In Pakistan, marriage is foregrounded as the ultimate female goal . Single women living alone are unheard of. Remaining unmarried is considered a huge social stigma for both the woman and her family (ibid). The young unmarried woman quoted above who chose to express herself freely on Facebook was criticized for deviating from the prescribed gender norms, and therefore declared unworthy of marriage. The second strategy is slut-shaming. The female interviewee is slut-shamed (They even called me a “gashti”) for not following the female norm. She reports this kind of online vigilantism as a regular occurrence in Pakistan (people are always going to judge you no matter what you do or don’t do). The style of her statement also conveys the sense that there is no escape from “loag kiya kahien gay” (what will people say) syndrome.
Online gender vigilantism is not limited to monitoring and regulating women’s behaviour; men also suffer from “loag kiya kahien gay”. Excerpt (6) illustrates a typical response from the public when a man transgresses the normative moulds of masculinity in Pakistan. The male interviewee in excerpt 6 was strongly criticized for openly sharing videos on gender issues in Pakistan on Facebook and Instagram.
Excerpt 6 (Male Interviewee 3; Interview in English)
People, particularly men, try to discipline me by saying things like how can you talk about gender issues on Facebook. You are not one of us (men). Your wife and daughters are going to sleep around with other men. However, my “ghairat” is not situated in what these men say about women in my family.
Whereas the female interviewee in excerpt 5 received comments attacking her lack of ‘morals’, the male interviewee in excerpt 6 is targeted by dragging the women in his family into the discussion to attack his “ghairat” (honour). He lists the most typical strategies that people use to induce him to adhere to the traditional masculine models. In the same way as the female interviewee in excerpt 5, he initially refers to his critics as people, but immediately specifies that men in particular attack him for talking about gender issues on social media. He further elaborates that one tactic used by men is exclusion (You are not one of us (men)), since this traditionalist group of men wholly reject gender equality (how can you talk about gender issues on Facebook). The tone of his words also reflects the notion that even talking about gender is considered a threat to Pakistani men. Thus, in situations like this, discussing gender is deemed a hostile and alien act.
Another common strategy to keep men in check, mentioned by the interviewee, is to attack the women in his family (Your wife and daughters are going to sleep around with other men). As mentioned earlier, in Pakistani society a man’s honour (“ghairat”) is directly associated with the women in his family . Therefore, by his disgracing the women in his family, conservative men not only seek to instil feelings of guilt and shame but also to nudge the interviewee to conform to the strict norms of masculinity. Interestingly, in his response to his critics, this “tempered radical” : p.308) blatantly rejects the traditionalist idea that male honour depends on female sexuality (However, my “ghairat” is not situated in what these men say about women in my family).
Gender Identities and Facebook as a Platform for Change and Agency
For some interviewees, social media also allows people to express themselves more freely. This group also highlighted the factors that support them in constructing and expressing their gender identities differently, such as the key role Facebook plays in raising social awareness, especially about gender issues, and in bringing financial independence, especially for women.
Voicing Dissent: Using Facebook to Raise Social Awareness
One of the most recurrent themes in the interviews revolved around how social media in general, and Facebook in particular, offered individuals opportunities to learn, offer and gain support as well as express their ideas and views. Excerpt (7) illustrates this view.
Excerpt 7 (Female Interviewee 4; Interview in English & Urdu)
Openly (“khule-aam”) discussing things [gender inequality] on Facebook is bringing about positive change. Yes. In my case, both my father and my brother have learnt so much from social media, especially when the whole Aurat March discussions took place on Facebook. I can see a positive change in their attitude towards gender issues. It is not just one voice, the more we speak collectively, the more we can bring change, but right now change is slow.
Excerpt 7 shows how the female interviewee views Facebook (and social media in general) as a learning space and platform that can potentially raise awareness of gender inequality. For example, she observes that Facebook can give people the opportunity of “openly discussing things'', using the expression “khule-aam”. The Urdu word “kuhla", meaning open, can refer to public debate on issues (such as those related to women) which, traditionally and historically, have been considered private . In this context, the choice of the phrase openly discussing things on Facebook thus suggests that Facebook has breached the traditional public/private divide. The interviewee then immediately adds “yes” to reaffirm and emphasize her first statement about Facebook that openly discussing things [gender inequality] on Facebook is bringing about positive change. She validates her view by referring to her own experiences and the Facebook debate on Aurat March and how this induced the male members of her family to change their attitude towards gender equality. The debate on Aurat March on social media platforms improved men’s understanding of women's everyday struggles.
Interestingly, towards the end of this excerpt, the interviewee switches from the singular pronouns I and my (e.g., In my case…, I can see…) to the plural we (the more we speak collectively, the more we can bring change). In this way, she is not only showing solidarity with the women activists on Facebook but also emphasizing how societal change can be collectively promoted via social media. Further, her comment (it is not just one voice, the more we speak collectively, the more we can bring change) suggests that besides providing women with a platform for resistance and free speech in the public sphere, Facebook can offer information and education on societal issues. However, she admits that such change is slow.
Similarly, in Excerpt 8, a male interviewee reports how he is using social media to raise social awareness about gender issues and gender inequality in Pakistani society.
Excerpt 8 (Male Interviewee 4; Interview in English)
My most rewarding experience doing these videos on Facebook, Instagram and YouTube (on gender issues) has been the number of men who agree privately with what I share. Some have thanked me for inspiring them to be better husbands and fathers. I think there are far more men who acknowledge the injustices of a patriarchal system than are immediately visible.
Here, the interviewee talks about his experience of sharing his videos on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube on gender injustice and discrimination in Pakistan. He believes his videos are helpful in changing gendered attitudes and in raising social awareness, as they have positively influenced the attitudes of some of his male followers. More generally, he thinks they exemplify what makes it difficult for men in Pakistan to openly support women’s rights. He further points out that many men agree with him (My most rewarding experience doing these videos on Facebook, Instagram and YouTube (on gender issues) has been the number of men who agree privately with what I share), claiming that his videos have made a difference and that men acknowledge the plight of women in Pakistani society. However, such acknowledgement is not expressed publicly, indicating that these men fear ridicule for not being real men. In short, he views the positive responses to his videos as an achievement. In the last sentence (I think there are far more men who acknowledge the injustices of a patriarchal system than is immediately visible), he states his opinion (I think) that the pervasive force of patriarchy in Pakistani society demands that men (and women) adopt a particular persona to avoid any potentially serious consequences of deviating from the traditionalist gender ideology.
Facebook as a Source of Economic Independence
None of the male interviewees mentioned that their use of social media platforms had been financially profitable. One of the women, however, argued that social media had played a pivotal role in helping her achieve financial security.
Excerpt 9 (Female Interviewee 5; Interview in English & Urdu)
For me the most redeeming aspect of using Facebook and Instagram is that I have been able to start my own clothing business. I was not allowed to go out to work so I thought of trying social media to reach out to the people. Alhamdulillah, with time my business grew. I have become independent and my family supports what I do. I make my own decisions; I feel powerful and this is so liberating.
Excerpt 9 is the clearest example in my data of how social media can have a positive and emancipatory impact on the lives of its users. The interviewee shared her experience of becoming a women entrepreneur with the help of social media platforms. According to her, social media had a redeeming role in her life. She then explains that, due to the conservative outlook of her family, she was prohibited from working outside the home (I was not allowed to go out to work), which led her to using Facebook and Instagram to connect with others (so I thought of trying social media to reach out to the people). Further, she describes how her decision to start her business not only empowered her economically, but also drew her family’s support. To emphasize and celebrate her economic empowerment and achievements, she uses words and phrases like “independent”, “I make my own decisions”, “I feel powerful” and “liberating”. These words, which generally belong to the male vocabulary, are especially significant when used by a woman. It is even arguable that the way she describes her work on Facebook projects a feminist stance, an attempt to challenge and change the power balance between men and women. Thus, the digital world can offer women new freedom, independence (I have become independent) and more control over their lives, helping them to do things previously impossible for them in their physical lives.