We all knew he would die by the end of the night:

he started the night with the final cocktail –

phenylephrine, vasopressin,

dobutamine, epinephrine,

which clamped

his vessels; we watched

the waves

recess and slow, until

five a.m. and

flatline.

My first death exam alone August of intern year, I read

bullet points

of what to do

before I opened the sliding door to his room.

We all knew he was gone. But I called his name

observed his chest wall

listened to his silent heart

pinched his nailbeds.

I shone a light into his right pupil and

Deep

Wide

Dark

Vast

Dead – were those eyes, but

in the hollow black canvas there is

a dance going on

unclamped

from the parameters of life