Abstract
Compassionate and self-image goals, respectively, are related to various positive and negative outcomes in friendships and in romantic relationships. There is, however, little research examining these goals in parents. This brief report presents two studies that examine parenting goals in relation to the satisfaction and frustration of parents’ needs for autonomy, competence, and relatedness. Parents of incoming first-year college students completed measures of compassionate and self-image goals, psychological need satisfaction (Studies 1 and 2), and psychological need frustration (Study 2). Compassionate goals predicted greater need satisfaction and less need frustration while self-image goals predicted lower need satisfaction and greater need frustration. These findings demonstrate links between parents’ goals for their relationships with their children and their perceptions about these relationships. Implications for these findings are discussed.
Highlights
-
Parenting goals and psychological need satisfaction and frustration of parents of college-bound children were measured.
-
Compassionate parenting goals predicts higher need satisfaction and lower need frustration in parent-child relationships.
-
Self-image parenting goals predicts lower need satisfaction and higher need frustration in parent-child relationships.
-
The links between parenting goals and need satisfaction and frustration are not moderated by parent gender.
Similar content being viewed by others
References
Bartholomew, K. J., Ntoumanis, N., Ryan, R. M., & Thøgersen-Ntoumani, C. (2011). Psychological need thwarting in the sport context: Assessing the darker side of athletic experience. Journal of Sport & Exercise Psychology, 33(1), 75–102. https://doi.org/10.1123/jsep.33.1.75.
Bornstein, M. H., Putnick, D. L., & Suwalsky, J. T. D. (2018). Parenting cognitions, parenting practices, and child adjustment: The standard model. Development and Psychopathology, 30, 399–416. https://doi.org/10.1017/S0954579417000931.
Brenning, K., & Soenens, B. (2017). A self-determination theory perspective on postpartum depressive symptoms and early parenting behaviors. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 73(12), 1729–1743. https://doi.org/10.1002/jclp.22480.
Brenning, K., Soenens, B., Mabbe, E., & Vansteenkiste, M. (2017). Ups and downs in the joy of motherhood: Maternal well-being as a function of psychological needs, personality, and infant temperament. Journal of Happiness Studies, 20(1), 229–250. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10902-017-993600.
Canevello, A., & Crocker, J. (2010). Creating good relationships: Responsiveness, relationship quality, and interpersonal goals. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 99(1), 78–106. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0018186.
Conti, R. (2015). Compassionate parenting as a key to satisfaction, efficacy, and meaning among mothers of children with autism. Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders, 45(7), 2008–2018. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10803-015-2360-6.
Costa, S., Ntoumanis, N., & Bartholomew, K. J. (2015). Predicting the brighter and darker sides of interpersonal relationships: Does psychological need thwarting matter? Motivation and Emotion, 39(1), 11–24. https://doi.org/10.1007/s11031-014-9427-0.
Crocker, J., & Canevello, A. (2008). Creating and undermining social support in communal relationships: The role of compassionate and self-image goals. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 95(3), 555–575. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.95.3.555.
Crocker, J., Canevello, A., Breines, J. G., & Flynn, H. (2010). Interpersonal goals and change in anxiety and dysphoria in first-semester college students. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 98(6), 1009–1024. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0019400.
Deci, E. L., & Ryan, R. M. (1985). Intrinsic motivation and self-determination in human behavior. Springer, New York, NY
Deci, E. L., & Ryan, R. M. (2000). The “what” and “why” of goal pursuits: Human needs and the self-determination of behavior. Psychological Inquiry, 11(4), 227–268. https://doi.org/10.1207/S15327965PLI1104_01.
De Los Reyes, A., & Kazdin, A. E. (2005). Informant discrepancies in the assessment of childhood psychopathology: A critical review, theoretical framework, and recommendations for further study. Psychological Bulletin, 131(4), 483–509. https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-2909.131.4.483.
Ebersold, S., Rahm, T., & Heise, E. (2019). Autonomy support and well-being in teachers: Differential mediations through basic psychological need satisfaction and frustration. Social Psychology of Education, 22, 921–942. https://doi.org/10.1007/s11218-019-09499-1.
Fagan, J., Day, R., Lamb, M. E., & Cabrera, N. J. (2014). Should researchers conceptualize differently the dimensions of parenting for fathers and mothers? Journal of Family Theory & Review, 6(4), 390–405. https://doi.org/10.1111/jftr.12044.
Hadden, B. W., & Knee, C. R. (2015). Who am I in it for? Interpersonal goals and secure base support. Self and Identity, 14(6), 675–691. https://doi.org/10.1080/15298868.2015.1062796.
Hadden, B. W., Smith, C. V., & Knee, C. R. (2014a). The way I make you feel: How relatedness and compassionate goals promote partner’s relationship satisfaction. The Journal of Positive Psychology, 9(2), 155–162. https://doi.org/10.1080/17439760.2013.858272.
Hadden, B. W., Øverup, C. S., & Knee, C. R. (2014b). Removing the ego: Need fulfillment, self-image goals, and self-presentation. Self and Identity, 13(3), 274–293. https://doi.org/10.1080/15298868.2013.815398.
La Guardia, J. G., Ryan, R. M., Couchman, C. E., & Deci, E. L. (2000). Within-person variation in security of attachment: A self-determination theory perspective on attachment, need fulfillment, and well-being. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 79(3), 367–384. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.79.3.367.
La Guardia, J. G., & Patrick, H. (2008). Self-determination theory as a fundamental theory of close relationships. Canadian Psychology/Psychologie Canadienne, 49(3), 201–209. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0012760.
Le, B. M., & Impett, E. A. (2019). Parenting goal pursuit is linked to emotional well-being, relationship quality, and responsiveness. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 36(3), 879–904. https://doi.org/10.1177/0265407517747417.
Longo, Y., Gunz, A., Curtis, G. J., & Farsides, T. (2016). Measuring need satisfaction and frustration in educational and work contexts: The Need Satisfaction and Frustration Scale (NSFS). Journal of Happiness Studies, 17(1), 295–317. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10902-014-9595-3.
Mabbe, E., Soenens, B., Vansteenkiste, M., van der Kaap-Deeder, J., & Mouratidis, A. (2018). Day-to-day variation in autonomy-supportive and psychologically controlling parenting: The role of parents’ daily experiences of need satisfaction and need frustration. Parenting: Science and Practice, 18(2), 86–109. https://doi.org/10.1080/15295192.2018.1444131.
Masten, A. S., Burt, K. B., Roisman, G. I., Obradović, J., Long, J. D., & Tellegen, A. (2004). Resources and resilience in the transition to adulthood: Continuity and change. Development and Psychopathology, 16(4), 1071–1094. https://doi.org/10.1017/S0954579404040143.
Moeller, S. J., Crocker, J., & Bushman, B. J. (2009). Creating hostility and conflict: Effects of entitlement and self-image goals. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 45(2), 448–452. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jesp.2008.11.005.
Nelson, L. J., Padilla-Walker, L. M., Christensen, K. J., Evans, C. A., & Carroll, J. S. (2011). Parenting in emerging adulthood: An examination of parenting clusters and correlates. Journal of Youth and Adolescence, 40(6), 730–743. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10964-010-9584-88.
Nelson, S. K., Kushlev, K., & Lyubomirsky, S. (2014). The pains and pleasures of parenting: When, why, and how is parenthood associated with more or less-well-being? Psychological Bulletin, 140(3), 846–895. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0035444.
Nishimura, T., & Suzuki, T. (2016). Basic psychological need satisfaction and frustration in Japan: Controlling for the big five personality traits. Japanese Psychological Research, 58(4), 320–331. https://doi.org/10.1111/jpr.12131.
O’Connor, T. G. (2002). Annotation: The “effects” of parenting reconsidered: Findings, challenges, and applications. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 43(5), 555–572. https://doi.org/10.1111/1469-7610.00046.
Pereira, A. I., Muris, P., Mendonça, D., Barros, L., Goes, A. R., & Marques, T. (2016). Parental involvement in cognitive-behavioral intervention for anxious children: Parents’ in-session and out-session activities and their relationship with treatment outcome. Child Psychiatry and Human Development, 47(1), 113–123. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10578-015-0549-8.
Ryan, R. M., & Deci, E. L. (2000). The darker and brighter sides of human existence: Basic psychological needs as a unifying concept. Psychological Inquiry, 11(4), 319–338. https://doi.org/10.1207/S15327965PLI1104_03.
Sanders, M. R., & Mazzucchelli, T. G. (2013). The promotion of self-regulation through parenting interventions. Clinical Child and Family Psychology Review, 16(1), 1–17. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10567-013-0129-z.
Sanders, M. R., & Mazzucchelli, T. G. (2022). Mechanisms of change in population-based parenting interventions for children and adolescents. Journal of Clinical Child and Adolescent Psychology. https://doi.org/10.1080/15374416.2022.2025598
Treutler, C. M., & Epkins, C. C. (2003). Are discrepancies among child, mother, and father reports on children’s behavior related to parents’ psychological symptoms and aspects of parent-child relationships? Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology, 31(1), 13–27.
Van der Kapp-Deeder, J., Vansteenkiste, M., Soenens, B., Loeys, T., Mabbe, E., & Garguerevich, R. (2015). Autonomy-supportive parenting and autonomy-supportive sibling interactions: The role of mothers’ and siblings’ psychological need satisfaction. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 41(11), 1590–1604. https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167215602225.
Vansteenkiste, M., & Ryan, R. M. (2013). On psychological growth and vulnerability: Basic psychological need satisfaction and need frustration as a unifying principle. Journal of Psychotherapy Integration, 23(3), 263–280. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0032359
Walters, G. D. (2019). Mothers and fathers, sons and daughters: Parental knowledge and the quality of the parent-child relationship as predictors of delinquency in same- and cross-sex parent-child dyads. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 28, 1850–1861. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10826-019-01409-5.
Author information
Authors and Affiliations
Corresponding author
Ethics declarations
Conflict of interest
The authors declare no competing interests.
Additional information
Publisher’s note Springer Nature remains neutral with regard to jurisdictional claims in published maps and institutional affiliations.
Rights and permissions
Springer Nature or its licensor (e.g. a society or other partner) holds exclusive rights to this article under a publishing agreement with the author(s) or other rightsholder(s); author self-archiving of the accepted manuscript version of this article is solely governed by the terms of such publishing agreement and applicable law.
About this article
Cite this article
Smith, C.V., Bilsky, S.A., Fuentes, J.D. et al. Looking Good or Being Good? Parenting Goals Predict Need Satisfaction and Frustration in Mothers and Fathers. J Child Fam Stud 32, 2444–2452 (2023). https://doi.org/10.1007/s10826-023-02604-1
Accepted:
Published:
Issue Date:
DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s10826-023-02604-1