Abstract
Informed by prior work on social withdrawal and gender role norms, the present study utilizes data from a large sample of U.S. (n = 656) and Canadian (n = 560) university students (Mage = 19.65 years) to test if the degree to which behaviors of social withdrawal are judged to be acceptable depends on (a) the motivation underlying the behavior (i.e., social withdrawal due to shyness versus unsociability versus avoidance or differences in withdrawal type) and (b) the gender of the actor (or the hypothetical person depicted as engaging in the behavior) and (c) the gender of the participant (or the observer). Results showed that participants were most accepting of unsociability, although perceptions differed somewhat according to the genders of the actor and the participant. For instance, participants were more accepting of shyness and avoidance in men but more accepting of unsociability in women. Findings have important implications for the refinement of theory and research because they highlight the need to more carefully consider the oftentimes neglected interface between social withdrawal and gender.
This is a preview of subscription content, log in via an institution to check access.
Similar content being viewed by others
References
Asendorpf, J. B. (1990). Beyond social withdrawal: Shyness, unsociability, and peer avoidance. Human Development, 33, 250–259. https://doi.org/10.1159/000276522.
Bian, L., Leslie, S. J., & Cimpian, A. (2017). Gender stereotypes about intellectual ability emerge early and influence children’s interests. Science, 355, 389–391. https://doi.org/10.1126/science.aah6524.
Boivin, M., & Hymel, S. (1997). Peer experiences and social self-perceptions: A sequential model. Developmental Psychology, 33, 135–145. https://doi.org/10.1037//0012-1649.33.1.135.
Boivin, M., Hymel, S., & Bukowski, W. M. (1995). The roles of social withdrawal, peer rejection, and victimization by peers in predicting loneliness and depressed mood in childhood. Development and Psychopathology, 7, 765–785. https://doi.org/10.1017/S0954579400006830.
Bowker, J. C., & Raja, R. (2011). Social withdrawal subtypes during early adolescence in India. Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology, 39(2), 201–212. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10802-010-9461-7.
Bowker, J. C., Nelson, L. J., Markovic, A., & Luster, S. (2014). Social withdrawal during adolescence and emerging adulthood. In R. J. Coplan & J. C. Bowker (Eds.), A handbook of solitude: Psychological perspectives on social isolation, social withdrawal, and being alone (pp. 167–183). New York: Wiley-Blackwell. https://doi.org/10.1002/9781118427378.ch10.
Bowker, J. C., Ojo, A. A., & Bowker, M. H. (2016). Brief report: Perceptions of social withdrawal during emerging adulthood in Lagos, Nigeria. Journal of Adolescence, 47, 1–4. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.adolescence.2015.11.006.
Bowker, J. C., Stotsky, M. T., & Etkin, R. G. (2017). How BIS/BAS and psycho-behavioral variables distinguish between social withdrawal subtypes during emerging adulthood. Personality and Individual Differences, 119, 283–288. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2017.07.043.
Burgess, K. B., Wojslawowicz, J. C., Rubin, K. H., Rose-Krasnor, L., & Booth-LaForce, C. (2006). Social information processing and coping strategies of shy/withdrawn and aggressive children: Does friendship matter? Child Development, 77, 371–383. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-8624.2006.00876.x.
Butler, A. C., Chapman, J. E., Forman, E. M., & Beck, A. T. (2006). The empirical status of cognitive-behavioral therapy: A review of meta-analyses. Clinical Psychology Review, 26, 17–31. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cpr.2005.07.003.
Cann, A. (2004). Rated importance of personal qualities across four relationships. Journal of Social Psychology., 144, 322–334. https://doi.org/10.3200/SOCP.144.3.322-334.
Caspi, A., Elder, G. H., & Bem, D. J. (1988). Moving away from the world: Life-course patterns of shy children. Developmental Psychology, 24, 824–831. https://doi.org/10.1037/0012-1649.23.2.308.
Chen, X. (2019). Culture and shyness in childhood and adolescence. New Ideas in Psychology, 53, 58–66. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.newideapsych.2018.04.007.
Collier, K. L., Bos, H. M., & Sandfort, T. G. (2012). Intergroup contact, attitudes toward homosexuality, and the role of acceptance of gender non-conformity in young adolescents. Journal of Adolescence, 35, 899–907. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.adolescence.2011.12.010.
Coplan, R. J., & Armer, M. (2007). A “multitude” of solitude: A closer look at social withdrawal and nonsocial play in early childhood. Child Development Perspectives, 1, 26–32. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1750-8606.2007.00006.x.
Coplan, R. J., Prakash, K., O'Neil, K., & Armer, M. (2004). Do you "want" to play? Distinguishing between conflicted shyness and social disinterest in early childhood. Developmental Psychology, 40, 244–258. https://doi.org/10.1037/0012-1649.40.2.244.
Coplan, R. J., Wilson, J., Frohlick, S. L., & Zelenski, J. (2006). A person-oriented analysis of behavioral inhibition and behavioral activation in children. Personality and Individual Differences, 41, 917–927. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2006.02.019.
Coplan, R. J., Girardi, A., Findlay, L. C., & Frohlick, S. L. (2007). Understanding solitude: Young children's attitudes and responses toward hypothetical socially withdrawn peers. Social Development, 16, 390–409. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-9507.2007.00390.x.
Coplan, R. J., Zheng, S., Weeks, M., & Chen, X. (2012). Young children’s perceptions of social withdrawal in China and Canada. Early Child Development and Care, 182, 591–607. https://doi.org/10.1080/03004430.2011.566328.
Coplan, R., Rose-Krasnor, L., Weeks, M., Kingsbury, A., Kingsbury, M., & Bullock, A. (2013). Alone is a crowd: Social motivations, social withdrawal, and socio-emotional functioning in later childhood. Developmental Psychology, 49, 861–875. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0028861.
Coplan, R. J., Ooi, L. L., & Nocita, G. (2015). When one is company and two is a crowd: Why some children prefer solitude. Child Development Perspectives, 9, 133–137. https://doi.org/10.1111/cdep.12131.
Coplan, R. J., Ooi, L. L., & Baldwin, D. (2019). Does it matter when we want to be alone? Exploring developmental timing effects in the implications of unsociability. New Ideas in Psychology, 53, 47–57. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.newideapsych.2018.01.001.
Deater-Deckard, K. (2001). Annotation: Recent research examining the role of peer relationships in the development of psychopathology. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry and Allied Disciplines, 42, 565–579. https://doi.org/10.1017/S0021963001007272.
Ding, X., Coplan, R. J., Sang, B., Liu, J., Pan, T., & Cheng, C. (2015). Young Chinese children’s beliefs about the implications of subtypes of social withdrawal: A first look at social avoidance. British Journal of Developmental Psychology, 33, 159–173. https://doi.org/10.1111/bjdp.12081.
Doey, L., Coplan, R. J., & Kingsbury, M. (2014). Bashful boys and coy girls: A review of gender differences in childhood shyness. Sex Roles, 70, 255–266. https://doi.org/10.1007/s11199-013-0317-9.
Ellemers, N. (2018). Gender stereotypes. Annual Review of Psychology, 69, 275–298. https://doi.org/10.1146/annurev-psych-122216-011719.
Feinman, S. (1981). Why is cross-sex-role behavior more approved for girls than for boys? A status characteristic approach. Sex Roles, 7, 289–300. https://doi.org/10.1007/BF00287543.
Gaffney, H., Ttofi, M. M., & Farrington, D. P. (2018). Evaluating the effectiveness of school-bullying prevention programs: An updated meta-analytical review. Aggression and Violent Behavior, 45, 111–133. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.avb.2018.07.001.
Gazelle, H., Peter, D., & Karkavandi, M. A. (2014). Commentary: Bashful boys and coy girls: A review of gender differences in childhood shyness. Sex Roles, 70, 285–308. https://doi.org/10.1007/s11199-014-0361-0.
Goossens, L. (2014). Affinity for aloneness and preference for solitude in childhood: Linking two research traditions. In R. J. Coplan & J. Bowker (Eds.), The handbook of solitude: Psychological perspectives on social isolation, social withdrawal, and being alone (pp. 150–166). New York: Wiley-Blackwell. https://doi.org/10.1002/9781118427378.ch9.
Gordon, A. R., Krieger, N., Okechukwu, C. A., Haneuse, S., Samnaliev, M., Charlton, B. M., … Austin, S. B. (2017). Decrements in health-related quality of life associated with gender nonconformity among US adolescents and young adults. Quality of Life Research, 26, 2129–2138. https://doi.org/10.1007/s11136-017-1545-1.
Greco, L. A., & Morris, T. L. (2001). Treating childhood shyness and related behavior: Empirically evaluated approaches to promote positive social interactions. Clinical Child and Family Psychology Review, 4, 299–318. https://doi.org/10.1023/A:1013543320648.
Huesmann, L. R., & Guerra, N. G. (1997). Children’s normative beliefs about aggression and aggressive behavior. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 72, 408–419. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.72.2.408.
Jonason, P. K., Webster, G. D., Schmitt, D. P., Li, N. P., & Crysel, L. (2012). The antihero in popular culture: Life history theory and the dark triad personality traits. Review of General Psychology, 16, 192–199. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0027914.
Kane, E. W. (2006). “No way my boys are going to be like that!” parents’ responses to children’s gender nonconformity. Gender & Society, 20, 149–176. https://doi.org/10.1177/0891243205284276.
Killen, M., & Turiel, E. (1998). Adolescents’ and young adults’ evaluations of helping and sacrificing for others. Journal of Research on Adolescence, 8, 355–375. https://doi.org/10.1207/s15327795jra0803_4.
LaMar, L., & Kite, M. (1998). Sex differences in attitudes toward gay men and lesbians: A multidimensional perspective. Journal of Sex Research, 35, 189–196. https://doi.org/10.1080/00224499809551932.
Larson, R. W. (1997). The emergence of solitude as a constructive domain of experience in early adolescence. Child Development, 68, 80–93. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-8624.1997.tb01927.x.
Larson, R., & Csikszentmihalyi, M. (1978). Experiential correlates of time alone in adolescence. Journal of Personality, 46, 677–693. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-6494.1978.tb00191.x.
Larson, R. W., Raffaelli, M., Richards, M. H., Ham, M., & Jewell, L. (1990). Ecology of depression in late childhood and early adolescence: A profile of daily states and activities. Journal of Abnormal Psychology, 99, 92–102. https://doi.org/10.1037/0021-843X.99.1.92.
Maes, M., Klimstra, T., Van den Noortgate, W., & Goossens, L. (2015). Factor structure and measurement invariance of a multidimensional loneliness scale: Comparisons across gender and age. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 24, 1829–1837. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10826-014-9986-4.
Morison, P., & Masten, A. S. (1991). Peer reputation in middle childhood as a predictor of adaptation in adolescence: A seven-year follow-up. Child Development, 62, 991–1007. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-8624.1991.tb01585.x.
Moritz Rudasill, K. M., & Kalutskaya, I. (2014). Being shy at school. Sex Roles, 70, 267–273. https://doi.org/10.1007/s11199-014-0345-0.
Nelson, L. J. (2013). Going it alone: Comparing subtypes of withdrawal on indices of adjustment and maladjustment in emerging adulthood. Social Development, 22, 522–538. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-9507.2012.00671.x.
Nelson, L. J., Coyne, S. M., Howard, E., & Clifford, B. N. (2016). Withdrawing to a virtual world: Associations between subtypes of withdrawal, medial use, and maladjustment in emerging adults. Developmental Psychology, 52, 933–942. https://doi.org/10.1037/t27541-000.
Nguyen, T. V. T., Ryan, R. M., & Deci, E. L. (2018). Solitude as an approach to affective self-regulation. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 44, 92–106. https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167217733073.
Nolen-Hoeksema, S., Wisco, B. E., & Lyubomirsky, S. (2008). Rethinking rumination. Perspectives on Psychological Science, 3, 400–424. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1745-6924.2008.00088.x.
Oh, W., Rubin, K. H., Bowker, J. C., Booth-LaForce, C., Rose-Krasnor, L., & Laursen, B. (2008). Trajectories of social withdrawal from middle childhood to early adolescence. Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology, 36, 553–566. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10802-007-9199-z.
Rapee, R. M., Kim, J., Wang, J., Liu, X., Hofmann, S. G., Chen, J., … Alden, L. E. (2011). Perceived impact of socially anxious behaviors on individuals' lives in Western and east Asian countries. Behavior Therapy, 42, 485–492. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.beth.2010.11.004.
Rubin, K. H., & Barstead, M. G. (2014). Gender differences in child and adolescent social withdrawal: A commentary. Sex Roles, 70, 274–284. https://doi.org/10.1007/s11199-014-0357-9.
Rubin, K. H., & Coplan, R. J. (2004). Paying attention to and not neglecting social withdrawal and social isolation. Merrill-Palmer Quarterly, 50, 506–534. https://doi.org/10.1353/mpq.2004.0036.
Rubin, K. H., Hymel, S., & Mills, R. S. (1989). Sociability and social withdrawal in childhood: Stability and outcomes. Journal of Personality, 57, 237–255. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-6494.1989.tb00482.x.
Rubin, K. H., Wojslawowicz, J. C., Rose-Krasnor, L., Booth-LaForce, C., & Burgess, K. B. (2006). The best friendships of shy/withdrawn children: Prevalence, stability, and relationship quality. Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology, 34, 139–153. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10802-005-9017-4.
Rubin, K. H., Coplan, R. J., & Bowker, J. C. (2009). Social withdrawal in childhood. Annual Review of Psychology, 60, 141–171. https://doi.org/10.1146/annurev.psych.60.110707.163642.
Simpson, A. E., & Stevenson-Hinde, J. (1985). Temperamental characteristics of three-to four-year-old boys and girls and child-family interactions. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 26, 43–53. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1469-7610.1985.tb01627.x.
Stevenson-Hinde, J., & Glover, A. (1996). Shy girls and boys: A new look. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry and Allied Disciplines, 37, 181–187. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1469-7610.1996.tb01389.x.
Stockard, J., & Johnson, M. M. (1979). The social origins of male dominance. Sex Roles, 5, 199–218. https://doi.org/10.1007/BF00287931.
Stormshak, E. A., Bierman, K. L., Bruschi, C., Dodge, K. A., & Coie, J. D. (1999). The relation between behavior problems and peer preference in different classroom contexts. Child Development, 70, 169–182. https://doi.org/10.1111/1467-8624.00013.
Thomas, R. N., & Blakemore, J. E. O. (2013). Adults’ attitudes about gender nonconformity in childhood. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 42, 399–412. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10508-012-0023-7.
van Roekel, E., Goossens, L., Verhagen, M., Wouters, S., Engels, R. C., & Scholte, R. H. (2014). Loneliness, affect, and adolescents' appraisals of company: An experience sampling method study. Journal of Research on Adolescence, 24, 350–363. https://doi.org/10.1111/jora.12061.
White, C. R., & Jenkins, D. D. (2017). College students' acceptance of trans women and trans men in gendered spaces: The role of physical appearance. Journal of Gay & Lesbian Social Services, 29, 41–67. https://doi.org/10.1080/10538720.2016.1261749.
Wilson, M., & Daly, M. (1985). Competitiveness, risk taking, and violence: The young male syndrome. Ethology and Sociobiology, 6, 59–73. https://doi.org/10.1016/0162-3095(85)90041-X.
Author information
Authors and Affiliations
Corresponding author
Ethics declarations
Research Involving Human Participants
All procedures performed in studies involving human participants were in accordance with the ethical standards of Institutional Review Boards at the University at Buffalo and Carleton University. and with the 1964 Helsinki declaration and its later amendments or comparable ethical standards.
Informed Consent
Informed written consent was obtained from all participants included in the study prior to the completion of measures.
Additional information
Publisher’s Note
Springer Nature remains neutral with regard to jurisdictional claims in published maps and institutional affiliations.
Electronic Supplementary Material
ESM 1
(DOCX 19 kb)
Rights and permissions
About this article
Cite this article
Bowker, J.C., Ooi, L.L., Coplan, R.J. et al. When is it Okay to be Alone? Gender Differences in Normative Beliefs about Social Withdrawal in Emerging Adulthood. Sex Roles 82, 482–492 (2020). https://doi.org/10.1007/s11199-019-01065-5
Published:
Issue Date:
DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s11199-019-01065-5