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The Kind of Friend I Think I Am: Perceptions of Autistic and Non-autistic Young Adults

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Abstract

Autistic people have different preferences for friendship than non-autistic people. The aims of the current project were to determine how autistic people prefer to behave in their friendships and how this compares to the friendship practices reported by non-autistic participants. Autistic (n = 102) and non-autistic (n = 107) young adults between the ages of 18 and 24 years completed an online survey comprised of selected questions from the Friendship Questionnaire. Binary logistic regression and multivariate general linear modeling were used to analyze and compare the responses across the groups. Results identified differences in the preferred friendship practices between the participant groups, which may further confirm the Double Empathy Theory and provide a context for understanding the friendship normative practices of autistic people.

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Acknowledgements

The authors would like to thank the Interactive Autism Network for their assistance in recruiting the sample of young adults with ASD. The authors would also like to thank all of the young adults who participated in this research study.

Author information

Authors and Affiliations

Authors

Contributions

Material preparation, data collection and analysis were performed by EHF. All drafts and revisions of the manuscript were written by EHF.

Corresponding author

Correspondence to Erinn H. Finke.

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Appendices

Appendix 1

  1. 1.

    Select the statement that mot applies to you:

    1. a.

      When I talk with my friend(s) on the phone, it is usually to make arrangements rather than to chat

    2. b.

      When I talk with my friend(s) on the phone, it is usually to chat rather than to make arrangements

  2. 2.

    Select the statement that most applies to you:

    1. a.

      I prefer meeting my friend(s) for a specific activity, e.g., going to the movies, playing golf

    2. b.

      I prefer meeting my friend(s) for a chat, e.g., at a pub or at a café

  3. 3.

    Select the statement that most applies to you:

    1. a.

      My friend(s) value me more as someone who is a support to them than as someone to have fun with

    2. b.

      My friend(s) value me more as someone to have fun with than as someone who is a support to them

  4. 4.

    Select the statement that most applies to you:

    1. a.

      If my friend(s) had a problem, I would be better at discussing their feelings about the problem than coming up with practical solutions

    2. b.

      If my friend(s) had a problem, I would be better at coming up with practical solutions than discussing their feelings about the problem

  5. 5.

    Select the statement that most applies to you:

    1. a.

      If my friend was having personal problems, I would wait for them to contact me as I wouldn’t want to interfere

    2. b.

      If my friend was having personal problems, I would contact them to discuss the problem

  6. 6.

    Select the statement that most applies to you:

    1. a.

      If I have something critical to say to my friend(s), I think it is best to broach the subject gently

    2. b.

      If I have something critical to say to my friend(s), I think it is best to just come right out and say it

  7. 7.

    If I fell out with my best friend and I thought that I hadn’t done anything wrong, I would:

    1. a.

      Do whatever it takes to repair the relationship

    2. b.

      Be willing to make the first move, as long as they reciprocated

    3. c.

      Be willing to sort out the problem, if they made the first move

    4. d.

      Not be able to be their close friend anymore

  8. 8.

    In terms of personality, how similar to your friend(s) do you tend to be?

    1. a.

      Very dissimilar

    2. b.

      Not very similar

    3. c.

      Quite similar

    4. d.

      Very similar

  9. 9.

    In terms of interests, how similar to your friend(s) do you tend to be?

    1. a.

      Very dissimilar

    2. b.

      Not very similar

    3. c.

      Quite similar

    4. d.

      Very similar

  10. 10.

    How often do you make plans to meet with your friend(s) that live near you?

    1. a.

      Once or twice a year

    2. b.

      Once every 2–3 months

    3. c.

      Once a month

    4. d.

      Once every couple of weeks

    5. e.

      Once or twice a week

    6. f.

      3 or 4 times a week

    7. g.

      More than any of the above

  11. 11.

    How many friends to you have that you’ve never met in “real life” or face-to-face?

    1. a.

      Zero, I have been in close proximity during interactions at some point with all of my friends

    2. b.

      One or two of my close friendships were made and maintained without face-to-face interaction (e.g., only interacted online)

    3. c.

      Most of my close friendships were made and are maintained without face-to-face interaction (e.g., only interact online)

Appendix 2

I would rather talk with a friend just to chat or to make arrangements

Variable

B(SE)

Wald (χ2)

Sig

OR

ASD

1.26(0.47)

7.32

0.007

3.54**

Gender

1.43(0.46)

9.71

0.002

4.16**

ASD by Gender

− 1.41(0.66)

4.63

0.031

0.24*

  1. For Model: X(3) = 19.41, p < 0.001, p < 0.05*, p < 0.01**, p < 0.001***

Model summary

Step

− 2 Log likelihood

Cox & Snell R Square

Nagelkerke R Square

1

260.30

0.09

0.12

Hosmer and Lemeshow Test

Step

Chi-square

df

Sig

1

0.00

2

1.00

I would rather meet up with a friend to chat or for a specific activity

Variable

B(SE)

Wald (χ2)

Sig

OR

ASD

1.56(0.47)

11.23

 < 0.001

4.75***

Gender

0.99(0.45)

4.81

0.03

2.68*

ASD by Gender

0.04(0.68)

0.003

0.96

1.04

  1. For Model: X(3) = 49.77, p < 0.001, p < 0.05*, p < 0.01**, p < 0.001***

Model summary

Step

− 2 Log likelihood

Cox & Snell R Square

Nagelkerke R Square

1

230.21

0.22

0.29

Hosmer and Lemeshow Test

Step

Chi-square

df

Sig

1

0.00

2

1.00

My friends value me as a support or as someone to have fun with

Variable

B(SE)

Wald (χ2)

Sig

OR

ASD

1.31(0.49)

7.11

0.008

3.71**

Gender

1.39(0.49)

8.22

0.004

4.02**

ASD by Gender

− 0.22(0.67)

0.10

0.75

0.81

  1. For Model: X(3) = 44.89, p < 0.001, p < 0.05*, p < 0.01**, p < 0.001***

Model summary

Step

− 2 Log likelihood

Cox & Snell R Square

Nagelkerke R Square

1

231.14

0.20

0.27

Hosmer and Lemeshow Test

Step

Chi-square

df

Sig

1

0.000

2

1.00

I am better at discussing feelings or practical solutions

Variable

B(SE)

Wald (χ2)

Sig

OR

ASD

0.47(0.45)

1.12

0.29

1.61

Gender

1.16(0.45)

6.74

0.01

3.20**

ASD by Gender

− 0.60(0.64)

0.88

0.35

0.55

  1. For Model: X(3) = 11.90, p.008, p < 0.05*, p < 0.01**, p < 0.001***

Model summary

Step

− 2 Log likelihood

Cox & Snell R Square

Nagelkerke R Square

1

262.51

0.06

0.08

Hosmer and Lemeshow Test

Step

Chi-square

df

Sig

1

0.000

2

1.00

I would contact my friend to discuss a problem or I would wait for them to contact me

Variable

B(SE)

Wald (χ2)

Sig

OR

ASD

1.39(0.48)

8.52

0.004

4.03**

Gender

− 0.37(0.47)

0.64

0.43

0.69

ASD by Gender

− 70(0.69)

1.02

0.31

2.01

  1. Note. For Model: X(3) = 33.43, p. < 001, p < 0.05*, p < 0.01**, p < 0.001***

Model summary

Step

− 2 Log likelihood

Cox & Snell R Square

Nagelkerke R Square

1

239.78

0.16

0.21

Hosmer and Lemeshow test

Step

Chi-square

df

Sig

1

0.000

2

1.00

If I had something to say to a friend I would just come out and say it or I would broach the subject gently

Variable

B(SE)

Wald (χ2)

Sig

OR

ASD

− 0.03(0.51)

0.003

0.95

0.97

Gender

− 0.77(0.46)

2.78

0.10

2.16

ASD by Gender

1.03(0.68)

2.26

0.13

2.79

  1. For Model: X(3) = 29.22, p. < 001, p < 0.05*, p < 0.01**, p < 0.001***

Model summary

Step

− 2 Log likelihood

Cox & Snell R Square

Nagelkerke R Square

1

243.62

0.14

0.18

Hosmer and Lemeshow Test

Step

Chi-square

df

Sig

1

0.000

2

1.00

Binary Logistic Regression for Personality (similar or dissimilar)

Variable

B(SE)

Wald (χ2)

Sig

OR

ASD

1.01(0.57)

3.11

0.08

2.74

Gender

0.77(0.59)

1.70

0.19

2.16

ASD by gender

− 0.36(0.78)

0.22

0.64

0.70

  1. For Model: X(3) = 11.30, p.010, p < 0.05*, p < 0.01**, p < 0.001***

Model summary

Step

− 2 Log likelihood

Cox & Snell R Square

Nagelkerke R Square

1

202.88

0.05

0.08

Hosmer and Lemeshow Test

Step

Chi-square

df

Sig

1

0.000

2

1.00

Binary Logistic Regression for Interests (similar or dissimilar)

Variable

B(SE)

Wald (χ2)

Sig

OR

ASD

0.07(0.87)

0.006

0.94

1.07

Gender

0.47(0.76)

0.38

0.54

1.60

ASD by Gender

1.25(1.09)

1.31

0.25

3.47

  1. For Model: X(3) = 17.16, p < 0.001, p < 0.05*, p < 0.01**, p < 0.001***

Model summary

Step

− 2 Log likelihood

Cox & Snell R Square

Nagelkerke R Square

1

157.99

0.08

0.14

Hosmer and Lemeshow Test

Step

Chi-square

df

Sig

1

0.000

2

1.00

How often do you meet up with your friends who live near you (“weekly” or “monthly or less”)

Variable

B(SE)

Wald (χ2)

Sig

OR

ASD

2.19(0.52)

18.02

 < 0.001

8.96***

Gender

− 0.44(0.70)

0.40

0.53

0.64

ASD by Gender

0.04(0.84)

0.002

0.97

0.1.04

  1. For Model: X(3) = 38.31, p < 0.001, p < 0.05*, p < 0.01**, p < 0.001***

Model Summary

Step

-2 Log likelihood

Cox & Snell R Square

Nagelkerke R Square

1

203.91

0.18

0.25

Hosmer and Lemeshow Test

Step

Chi-square

df

Sig

1

0.000

2

1.00

How many close friends do you have that you’ve never met “in real life” or face-to-face (zero or some

Variable

B(SE)

Wald (χ2)

Sig

OR

ASD

1.66(0.56)

8.90

0.003

5.26**

Gender

− 0.34(0.83)

0.16

0.69

0.71

ASD by Gender

0.11(0.96)

0.01

0.91

1.12

  1. For Model: X(3) = 18.02, p < 0.001, p < 0.05*, p < 0.01**, p < 0.001***

Model Summary

Step

− 2 Log likelihood

Cox & Snell R Square

Nagelkerke R Square

1

185.20

0.08

0.13

Hosmer and Lemeshow Test

Step

Chi-square

df

Sig

1

0.000

2

1.00

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Finke, E.H. The Kind of Friend I Think I Am: Perceptions of Autistic and Non-autistic Young Adults. J Autism Dev Disord 53, 3047–3064 (2023). https://doi.org/10.1007/s10803-022-05573-4

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